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Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Green-Haired Woman is City's Latest Highly Distinctive Alleged Bank Robber

Posted By on Tue, Sep 30, 2014 at 1:59 PM

click to enlarge Wanted: The Bank Robber of Oz
  • Wanted: The Bank Robber of Oz
Hiding in plain sight is a lot easier when you, yourself, are a plain sight — so a green-haired woman accused of knocking over a SoMa bank on Friday is going against the grain. (It's a long way to March 17, after all).

Planning bank heists apparently isn't always the Swiss Watch-like affair depicted in the movies. And yet, most robbers do manage to alter their strikingly individualistic appearances prior to committing the deed. Here in San Francisco, distinctive female suspects have not fared well. 

You may recall the string of 2010 robberies committed by a woman so striking that witnesses were able to recall her "distinctive red highlights; sunglasses; a black purse; denim dress; and silver flat sandals" in one instance and an orange purse in another. 

A Shelly Denise Jones was shortly thereafter arrested in connection with this and other robberies in which her appearance was less noteworthy (her decision to drive the bus she operated for work to the alleged robbery was also questionable, in retrospect).

In summation, it's a poor idea for a bank robber to pick up a reputation based on his or her distinctive appearance. So it went for the Bad Wig Bandit, the Acne Bandit, and A's Hat Bandit. 

So, if history is a precedent, the green-haired bandit will, too, be brought to justice. 

This will be the case if made-up history is a precedent, too

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.


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