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Tuesday, August 5, 2014

Fare Thee Well 415: The Dawn of the 628 Area Code Is Upon Us

Posted By on Tue, Aug 5, 2014 at 12:53 PM

click to enlarge Hold on. I'm coming.
Anyone attempting to land a place to reside in this city of ours knows all too well: The 415 is full. 

No, really. The 415 is full. In a long-coming sea change, the tapped 415 area code will soon give way to the 628. 

The folks from the phone company are not going to wrest your area code away from you (as they did with your humble narrator and other East Bay denizens in 1991). Rather, new numbers assigned following March 21, 2015 will be 628 numbers.

With the dawning of the age of the 628 upon us, we're all being implored by our telephonic overlords to start dialing our phones a little differently on the 16th of this month. 

In anticipation of new area codes, carriers are urging landline-users with 415 numbers to get in the habit of dialing 1 then the area code before every call. Come Feb. 21 of next year, this will be mandatory. 



It's easy to predict any number of hang-ups. Landline users skew a bit older, and are, presumably, a bit averse to change. Well, this is a change. Some of these people may, rather literally, be forced to alter their dialing habits. 

Beyond that, time will tell. A 628 area code will mark one as a Bay Area greenhorn — and open up holders to all manners of stereotyping. You'll be another goddamn interloper, taking your place alongside priced-out victims of gentrification (510); marijuana farmers/farmers (707); minivan-driving soccer moms/meth dealers (925); and more well-off priced-out victims of gentrification/tech barons (650).  

Inevitably, someone will start up an "I don't date 628" meme. Following in the footsteps of Ludacris, if one's paramour has a landline and obtains a new cell phone, it'll be possible to have hos in different area codes while remaining monogamous. 

Anyone with bright ideas regarding the ramifications of this new code is urged to call us. Dial 1 and then the area code and let 'er rip. 




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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Bio:
Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.

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