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Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Aliens and Fecal Matter Inundate BART in Very Convincing Spoof

Posted By on Tue, Mar 11, 2014 at 10:36 AM

click to enlarge mars.png
Even with its spanking new, poop-free, antiseptic vinyl seating, BART can't seem to shake its unsavory reputation. Last year's naked acrobat escapade and infamous seat tryst -- by a man so satisfied with the new vinyl, he went back and humped it twice -- certainly didn't help. Nor did this morning's Twitter announcement -- from an SFBARTAlerts feed with an official logo, but a suspicious 132 followers -- that Dublin and Pittsburg-bound trains faced 30 minute delays in Daly City, owing to "gratuitous anal contact." It's possible BART was beset by more furniture fetishists or a rogue intern. More likely, a malicious spoof artist set up an SFBARTAlerts account that uncannily resembles that official SFBARTAlert account. The only difference between them, in fact, is 10,700 followers, an "s," and credibility. It was enough to get us, at least. We're still awaiting comment from a BART spokesperson. Within minutes of its anal tweet, SFBARTAlerts unleashed more bedeviling missives to warn riders about aliens on the Fremont-bound line. Very unlikely. You can't make it all the way to earth without your own reliable form of transit.
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About The Author

Rachel Swan

Rachel Swan

Rachel Swan was a staff writer at SF Weekly from 2013 to 2015. In previous lives she was a music editor, IP hack, and tutor of Cal athletes.


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