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Monday, January 6, 2014

49ers Fans Celebrate, Stay Away from Emergency Room

Posted By on Mon, Jan 6, 2014 at 1:45 PM

This vehicle, and its passengers, managed to stay healthy
  • This vehicle, and its passengers, managed to stay healthy

Phil Dawson's kick sailed a few inches to the right of Davon House's outstretched arms and a few inches to the left of the right upright.

Ballgame. Niners win. The howls reverberated off the corrugated iron ceiling of the bar and the red-and-gold clad revelers took it outside. Libations were imbibed. Nicotine was ignited. Horns honked and flags waved. It was a party, all right.

But it wasn't the sort of party that landed participants in the Intensive-Care Unit -- one of those memorable nights that no one can remember. Rachael Kagan, spokeswoman for San Francisco General Hospital, reports that no pre-, during-, or post-game football celebrants ended up in the Emergency Room.

Like a Colin Kaepernick bootleg into the open field, that sounds a little too good to be true. But, Kagan insists, there didn't seem to be a greater concentration of football paraphernalia-clad souls in the hospital last night than most any other night.

When asked how this could be, she replied "The game wasn't in San Francisco, correct?"

Correct: It was in Green Bay, played atop THE FROZEN TUNDRA OF LAMBEAU FIELD.

"And they won?"

Again correct -- 23-20.

"That's two reasons people weren't coming to our ER."

The Niners next play in Charlotte at 10 a.m. on Sunday, Jan. 12 vs. the Carolina Panthers. Hopefully the pattern continues for both the team and the hospital.

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.

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