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Thursday, October 20, 2011

OccupySF Protesters Surfing Craigslist to Find Missed Connections and Sex

Posted By on Thu, Oct 20, 2011 at 3:30 PM

click to enlarge The 99 percent: bringing sexy back.
  • The 99 percent: bringing sexy back.
Revolution is to sex what Republicans are to comb-overs. Think about it: rugged Che in his Mao cap, the Black Panthers rocking their rad fros, Subcomandante Marcos in his mysterious Zapatista facemask -- sex appeal is as crucial to any self-respecting revolution as a megaphone. Don't even get us started on keffiyah scarves. Rrrrr. 

Well, judging by the Missed Connections and Casual Encounters on Craigslist, it seems the Occupy demonstrators are bringing sexy back. Maybe unwashed protesters with dirt under their fingernails isn't your thing (it's called radical chic, you 1 percenters), but these people seem to be inspiring some major unrequited lust across the Bay Area.

We'll start with this casual encounter entitled "Occupy Your Submissive Throat":

"Occupy wall street by day, occupy your throat by night! Dominant guy with 8 long inches and a bulging brain looking to make you kneel in front of him, open your mouth and feel his length cascading down your throat. You are submissive & want to be occupied." 

Oh, there's so much more. 

There's #occupymycock, which sounds like perhaps the worst idea ever: 

"occupy my cock tomorrow during lunch and I'll leave you with a sweet treat"

Okaaaay, on to more innocent interactions, from Missed Connections. Here's a plea from Occupy San Jose, a guy who wishes some woman would have smoked more weed with him: 

"Hey i was hanging out by the occupy protesters at city hall when u came up to me and my friends. You are very beautiful and sorry i didnt talk to you more. I wish you wouldve chilled for a lil while and smoked more :) hit me up if u see this :)" 

Here's a post, "Cute boy at #occupyoakland - m4m - 21 (oakland downtown)." Wait, doesn't this describe half the people at Occupy Oakland? We need more specifics!

Hey, you were the cute queer guy at occupy oakland. I wanted to say hey, but was too shy. I've been there the last few days and think you seem super rad. I'm the nerdy queer boy who you maybe saw. Hit me up! 

Here's a lady in Santa Rosa, who is savoring the memory of a dude in a black bandanna, but says his "vibrant personality" is what lingers in her memory. 

occupy santa rosa - w4m (santa rosa)

To the guy at Occupy S.R. on Saturday wearing a white tee shirt, khaki shorts, and a black bandana...your super attractive and your personality shines above all else. While viewing the footage I shot yesterday, you came up on various scenes and I remember seeing you at the G.A. 
Anyway, keep fighting for the cause! hope to see you again. If not, keep that vibrant personality of yours. It makes you look great ;)

While nobody was lusting after any OccupySFers, one girl on her way to the rally with her dad (well, that will kill your game) spotted a hottie on the BART. He reminded her of an elf from Lord of the Rings, and was reading Harry Potter, which can also explain why San Francisco was named one of the geekiest cities in the nation

Me: Short, auburn haired girl, who probably was showing signs of the lack of sleep I've had the past several days. I have thick rimmed glasses, was dressed in some sort of gypsy-aesthetic, and was reading Neil Gaiman's "Sandman." I was sitting next to an older man (my Father) on the way to the OCCUPY SF Rally. We got off at Civic Center, and you stayed on. I wish I could have said something more to you, but all I could proffer before I exited was "good book". You had the sweetest smile.

...Please forgive me my shameless idealism, [we wouldn't expect anything less from a Occupy SFer!] and, as Emerson spoke: "I am the lover of uncontained and immortal beauty." Especially when it's reading Harry Potter.

...Thank you for inspiring the aesthetic of a character in my new book. You will be credited in the acknowledgments section of the manuscript. Muses come from all places, and it seems appropriate that one could be found in a musty BART train on a sunny Saturday afternoon.

The Occupy movement is two steps away from becoming a "Love-In." This leaves us wondering: How did the hippies in the Haight ever manage so much free love without the Internet? 

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Lauren Smiley


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