Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Sports
Trent Baalke Is 49ers' GM. Quelle Surprise!
Posted
By Joe Eskenazi
on Wed, Jan 5, 2011 at 12:00 AM
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Huh. Didn't see that coming.
Yesterday, the San Francisco 49ers concluded their comprehensive search for a new general manager without leaving the training facility. In-house favorite Trent Baalke was hired to fill the vacant position -- a move only slightly less predictable than the plotline of a Popeye cartoon.
What other amazing developments are pending in 49erland?
- Team retains red and gold as uniform colors
- Players, coaches continue to credit supreme being for their workplace success
- Players, coaches mention team's "great tradition"
- Cheerleaders wear short skirts, tall boots
click to enlarge
Team continues to endeavor to score more points than its opponents and, thus, win
- Niners play home contests in lovable old shithole Candlestick Park
- The team's nickname, 49ers, will still be a reference to Gold Rush times
- The ball the team plays with continues to be longer than it is wide
- Touchdowns remain seven points. Field goals are three. Safeties are two. How many points is a drop-kick?
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Tags: 49ers, Candlestick Park, football, NFL, Trent Baalke, Image
About The Author
Joe Eskenazi
Bio:
Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left.
"Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015.
He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.
