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Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Ingenious Ancient Pregnant Woman-Boiling Water Burglary Plot Works Like Magic In Glen Park

Posted By on Wed, Jan 13, 2010 at 6:15 PM

The plan hatched by the two female robbers was ingenious in its simplicity. One of the two crooks would pose as a pregnant woman who needed boiling water. Why boiling water, exactly, is unclear. The fact that the woman who was to pretend she was with child appeared to be 70 with deep wrinkles ... well, it could happen. These types of ruses go back to Hans Christian Andersen days. If a wolf could pose as a grandmother and fool Little Red Riding Hood, then why shouldn't a grandmother pose as being pregnant? This is 2010, after all. We've got fertility drugs the Big Bad Wolf never dreamed of.

click to enlarge Let me in, I won't bite...
  • Let me in, I won't bite...
According to the Glen Park tale of delinquency chronicled in the Ingleside Police station newsletter, the two women knocked on a door in the 100 block of Monterey and told the woman who answered their sob story: One of the interlopers was pregnant, and needed some boiling water. The soon-to-be victim noticed the woman's advanced age (My Grandma -- what deep wrinkles you have!) but let the two women in anyways. The pregnant septuagenarian "kept [the victim] occupied" -- we assume while the unwitting woman boiled some water -- while the friend disappeared into the house and stole some booty.

The case is still under investigation, and the culprits are still at large. So a note to bleeding-heart San Franciscans: Keep your defenses up. Don't let them in -- not by the hair of your chinny chin chin!


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Lauren Smiley


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