Get SF Weekly Newsletters

Thursday, August 6, 2009

(Uh! With Your Drunk Self!) Say It Loud: I'm Blitzed and I'm Proud!

Posted By on Thu, Aug 6, 2009 at 5:30 AM

click to enlarge sobriety_test.jpg
There are many responses to the accusation "You're drunk!"

My personal favorite is to compose yourself, get down off the table, and demonstratively state: "Well, at least I'm something."

Always good for a laugh. Those waiters at the Benihana are still talking about it. But it wouldn't be so much fun if you were driving -- which was the case for a San Francisco motorist who didn't have quite as clever a rejoinder.

On late Tuesday, San Francisco police officers responded to an accident on 22nd and Taraval in which a driver had managed to collide with a parked car. When they asked the motorist if he was was inebriated, he responded with gusto:

"When the officers asked the driver if he had been drinking, he stated an obscenity coupled with Yeh!" reads the incident report.
By the way, Taraval station writes the best incident reports; the other day they noted the arrest of a man who'd threatened to kill his ex-girlfriend's new "consort." We're tickled by the attention to detail evident in noting the inebriate said "Yeh!" and not simply "Yeah!"

In any event, the man failed his field sobriety test and was arrested for drunk driving. Yeh, but at least he's something.

  • Pin It

Tags: , , ,

About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Popular Stories

  1. Most Popular Stories
  2. Stories You Missed

Like us on Facebook


  • clipping at Brava Theater Sept. 11
    Sub Pop recording artists 'clipping.' brought their brand of noise-driven experimental hip hop to the closing night of 2016's San Francisco Electronic Music Fest this past Sunday. The packed Brava Theater hosted an initially seated crowd that ended the night jumping and dancing against the front of the stage. The trio performed a set focused on their recently released Sci-Fi Horror concept album, 'Splendor & Misery', then delved into their dancier and more aggressive back catalogue, and recent single 'Wriggle'. Opening performances included local experimental electronic duo 'Tujurikkuja' and computer music artist 'Madalyn Merkey.'"