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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Supes Punt MTA Budget Imbroglio To Special Meeting Next Wednesday

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 6:01 PM

Oh, they're dragging this out...
  • Oh, they're dragging this out...
The ongoing rancor over the Municipal Transportation Agency's woeful budget has transformed into quite a cliff-hanger: First Board President David Chiu fired a shot across MTA and the mayor's bow by crafting legislation allowing the supes to scuttle the budget. Then, at the last minute, Chiu signed off on a tepid compromise -- earning the enmity of his peers. Then said peers resurrected the threat of voting down the budget and Supervisor John Avalos marched over to MTA headquarters to demand a meeting with CEO Nat Ford (it didn't accomplish much). Now, with another showdown scheduled for today, the Supes have continued the fun to a very special noon meeting on Wednesday, May 27 -- MTA Budget: The Final Battle (live on Pay-Per-View ... and free on SFGTV). 

The only element missing in this cliff-hanger is suspense over who's going off the cliff: It's the folks who ride Muni. Even if Avalos and pals manage to stave off the worst of it, this is a putrid budget for all parties; the supes' efforts are less akin to emergency room doctors attempting to resuscitate a wounded patient than morticians hoping to prettify a corpse.

Finally, it warrants mentioning that the Memorandum of Understanding

that would detail for what, exactly, the SFPD is billing Muni all those

millions was promised within 24 hours  -- 168 hours ago. MTA spokesman

Judson True says his agency and the police department are hoping to produce it in

"the coming weeks." When asked about the delay, he noted that "it's a

back and forth process between the agencies."

What isn't in this city?

Photo   |   Jim Herd

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Rating of State's Filthiest Beaches Set To Be Released Tomorrow -- But Here's How S.F. Is Doing In Realtime

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 2:59 PM

Beach bummed...
  • Beach bummed...
At a press conference Wednesday on Alameda's Crown Beach, members of the environmental outfit Heal the Bay will release their 2009 Beach Report card, grading the state's 500 beaches from A to F based upon the levels of harmful bacterial infestation. (The site of the announcement is either fitting or ironic based upon what the environmentalists say; locals grew up regarding Crown Beach as the place where all the detritus from San Francisco washes up).

The official grades -- and listing of the state's 10 most putrid beaches -- is embargoed until tomorrow. But, lucky for those of us who need to swim in the ocean now, Heal the Bay keeps meticulous week-by-week ratings of hundreds of beaches, including 17 in San Francisco (Did you know there were 17 beaches in this city?).

So, here's the good news: 14 of the S.F. beaches receive an A or A+ grade when it comes to not being infested with harmful bacteria. The bad news: Fort Funston (by the Lake Merced Overflow) gets a gentleman's B while a pair of Ocean Beach locales (by Pacheco and by Vicente) out-and-out flunk.

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Anti-Social Investment Watch: Ratings Agency Downgrades Half Moon Bay 'Vampire Bonds' To 'Robin Hood Bonds'

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 12:40 PM

This economic metaphor comes equipped with a band of merry men
  • This economic metaphor comes equipped with a band of merry men
Last Week we urged anti-social investors -- the opposite of do-gooder "social investors" who shun tobacco, blood diamonds, and the like -- to load up on a pending "vampire bond" coming out of Half Moon Bay, 30 miles southwest of San Francisco.

The bonds were designed to pay off an apparently bloodsucking Woodside land speculator who'd purchased a piece of property out of town, then went to court because of pre-existing environmental conditions that kept him from building a housing subdivision. The developer settled for $18 million -- which the tiny city with an annual budget of $11 million planned to pay off by issuing the aforementioned bonds.

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Luxuriously Spacious Accommodations Await Those Who Vote at City Hall

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 10:15 AM

There was no jostling for spots at City Hall this morning - JOE ESKENAZI
  • Joe Eskenazi
  • There was no jostling for spots at City Hall this morning
Has there been a more unpalatable choice than today's special election since castaways drew lots to see which crew member on the lifeboat would be eaten? Glancing over the dire measures on the ballot today, one can't help but think of Simon and Garfunkel's refrain in Mrs. Robinson: "Laugh about it, shout about it when you've got to choose -- any way you look at it you lose."

If you, like your humble narrator, were moved as a youth by television ads cajoling us to vote by scrolling over the lily-white headstones of fallen World War II soldiers -- but can't quite motivate yourself to run to your polling place -- here's some unusual motivation: Voting today will be relaxing. Voting sites are bereft of voters; between 7 a.m. and 9:30 this morning a full 40 people came in and cast their ballots at City Hall. That's right, they could have all come in the same bus. From April 20 until yesterday, 1,095 people cast early ballots at City Hall -- considering there have been 21 business days since then, that comes out to 52 voters a day.

How else to put it? Not many people have bothered to vote on the state's fiscal future -- so if the crowds, noise, and exuberance of our democracy has kept you from casting a ballot in person, don't let that dissuade you today. Yet while today's San Francisco voter turnout is expected to be "low" (a relative term locally), it may not be historically low (ditto).

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Guitar Hero: San Francisco Musician Says He's Located Instrument Pilfered in '72 -- and Sues To Get His Axe Back

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 8:25 AM

In a downer moment that must have left countless concert-goers blinking, shaking their heads, and bellowing, "drag, man!" Guitarist Ronnie Montrose actually stopped a show in mid-song, had the house lights turned on, and scoured the theater when his 1959 Gibson Les Paul Standard was stolen right off the stage.

Montrose, a San Franciscan, hasn't seen his guitar (which he bought from J. Geils) since that night on Oct. 10, 1972 when he played Dudley, Mass. with the Edgar Winter Band ... until now. The San Francisco musician -- who has played with Herbie Hancock, Van Morrison and others -- claims that after 37 years of scouring and thousands of dollars spent on private detectives, his guitar has turned up in the possession of British musician and guitar collector Gary Moore -- and, last week, Montrose filed suit in San Francisco District Court.

Gibson Les Paul models of this vintage are crafted of mahogany; only around 1,700 or so were ever made and no two guitars look exactly alike. Montrose claims he can identify his old axe from pictures of Moore's collection -- but, more exactingly, he says the serial number of the guitar is the same as the one filched from him in Dudley.   

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Seen In San Francisco: Whips, Leather -- and a Mini?

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 7:30 AM

Does the Geico Gecko know? - JOE ESKENAZI
  • Joe Eskenazi
  • Does the Geico Gecko know?

Our very own Matt Smith recently enraged those who engage in the self-described "BDSM lifestyle" for, among other transgressions, referring to film depictions of water-boarding and the application of car batteries to the genitalia as "torture porn."

That wasn't an option for the above motorist; "I ♥ Torture Porn" won't fit on a license plate.

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Soda Jerk: Felony Charge for Beverage Thief

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 6:30 AM

soda.jpg
The Taraval Police Station blotter carries this story of a man who pocketed a soda at a 7-11 and was subsequently arrested, then charged with a felony due to prior convictions. It's tempting to roll your eyes and wonder if our legal system's efforts are best used to prosecute thirsty petty thieves, but first read the bulletin and then try to muster sympathy for the culprit. (Officers' names have been omitted.)


05/16/09 2:45 pm 1300 block of 46th Avenue

Officers were inside a 7-11 store when they observed a man take a beverage from a cooler, put it in his pocket and walk past the uniformed officers and out of the store without paying for the merchandise. The officers stopped the man and arrested the resident of the 500 block of 36th Avenue for theft. He was charged with felony theft due to having prior convictions.

While you shouldn't be pilfering refreshing drinks when you already have prior convictions, you definitely shouldn't do it in front of not one, not two, but three police officers.

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So Newsom Wants To Charge a Cleanup Fee on Cigarettes? Fine -- But Let's Be Honest: The Only Reason To Do This Is Because Smokers Will Pay, And We Are Broke.

Posted By on Tue, May 19, 2009 at 5:30 AM

If Gavin Newsom gets his way, we'll owe Gary Trudeau 33 cents every time we use this picture - G.B. TRUDEAU
  • G.B. Trudeau
  • If Gavin Newsom gets his way, we'll owe Gary Trudeau 33 cents every time we use this picture

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