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Monday, April 20, 2009

Seen In San Francisco: Happy 4:20 From the Most Apropos Bread Truck In the Whole City

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 1:30 PM

Oh wow, man!
  • Oh wow, man!
Sorry, the above Vital Vittles truck, spotted on Church and Duboce, all too aptly describes the collegiate careers of many people we know.

As we noted earlier today, in addition to being Hitler's birthday (dark) and the first day of Dark Sky Week (very dark), April 20 is also marijuana aficionados' favorite self-serving excuse to smoke up (we're not judging; we also feel that possession of a bottle of good champagne is reason enough to celebrate).

With that in mind, the truck's reference to anything "baked" can be taken as an innuendo on this day of days. And while we're always a little worried that dropping a loaf of Vital Vittles could result in broken toes, suddenly we have a craving for some of their fresh bread ... Oh God! This is, like, the best bread, ever, man!

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SF Gov InAction: This Week's Meetings are Like Catnip for Angry People. Madnip, Anyone?

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 10:59 AM

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Monday, April 20 11 a.m. - Public Safety Committee Hey, remember that time an outside researcher published a report on how the SFPD could improve performance, and nothing happened? No, the other time. No, the other other time. You're probably thinking about the Police Executive Research Forum's organizational assessment of the SFPD, or Dr. Lorie Fridell's Fair and Impartial Policing report. But you COULD be thinking of the Public Safety Strategies Group's District Station Boundaries Analysis, for all I know. But I'm talking about the report by the Community Policing Advisory Committee. Duh. Those other reports are -- SO -- 2008, 2007, and 2008 (respectively). As is the case with most unsolicited advice given to police officers, all of this material has been given the right to remain silent. Until today, when David Campos has called a hearing to find out exactly what the SFPD's plans are for implementing all these ideas. I'm sure they have a plan for implementing all these ideas. It's just that they've been so busy - what with the Battlestar finale and everything.

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Alleged Serial Burglar Nabbed in West Portal

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 8:30 AM

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While, when it comes to homicides, it appears that it's once again open season in the city, it's nice to see that a concerted police effort to stamp out a spree of lesser crimes appears to have borne fruit. (It also gave the cops the opportunity to use the term "dragnet" with a straight face).

A string of what the police call "hot prowl" burglaries -- entries into people's homes as they sleep -- had been reported in West Portal, St. Francis Wood and Forest Hill, with the primary target being computers and electronics. The "dragnet" (ahem) comprised a beefing up of the number of plainclothes officers from Taraval station planted throughout the neighborhoods, who could quickly respond in the event of a burglary call.

It seems the plan came to fruition: In the early morning hours of Sunday, a West Portal couple was awakened by the noise of a burglar fleeing from their home.

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Thank You Readers! Here Are Your Entries For Barry Zito's Nickname.

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 7:30 AM

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Last week, we asked our readers to soft-toss us some suggestions for a fitting nickname for Barry Zito -- who, just as we queasily predicted, was bombed in his second start of the season and currently sports an earned-run average of exactly 10.00. Wow! A perfect 10!

I am impressed at the entries we have to choose from -- and, in honor of Zito, I've winnowed it down to my favorite 10. Feel free to comment on which of these you like best. Here they are in no particular order:

10. Barry "Me Alive" Zito;
9. Beat-o Zito;
8. Barry "The Zito Bandito" (as in he's robbing the team);
7. Heartbreaker Barry;
6. Barry "The Albatross" Zito

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Turn Off Your Damn Lights This Week and Revel in the Darkness

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 6:30 AM

VINCENT VAN GOGH
  • Vincent Van Gogh

Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: "It's all right, bubbeleh, I'll sit in the dark...
"

April 20 is a day that's just jam packed. It's the official Christmas for pot smokers (far out), Hitler's birthday (drag) and, the kickoff of International Dark Sky Week. If you don't smoke pot or revel in the tenants of National Socialism, sitting at home in the dark is, if nothing else, an affordable thing to do these days. So it's got that going for it ... which is nice.

Unnecessary lighting carries a number of consequences -- it pollutes the environment (power doesn't generate itself) and even kills birds. But the organizers of Dark Sky Week seem most concerned with overall "light pollution." In addition to obscuring the starlight above, light pollution crusaders even contend that artificial light throws off humans' and animals' biological functions -- and may even lead to mental and physical ailments.

Fair enough. And, while you're at it, turn off the damn thermostat when you're not home. But we'll leave the television on -- a policeman friend said the flickering light repels would-be burglars. And we don't feel like filling out another police report.


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A Murder Most Foul: View the Scene of San Francisco's Latest Homicide

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 5:30 AM

Click here for a larger map.

After weeks of quiet times, San Francisco's latest homicides have come in bunches. On Saturday morning, a 23-year-old Richmond man named James Jamonte Turner was shot to death at around 2 a.m. at Third and Folsom (above); three other men were seen fleeing the scene on foot.

That murder came just one day after Bayview's 21-year-old Norris Bennett was gunned down at around 4:40 p.m. in the vicinity of Griffith and Navy Streets (where the good folks from Google Street View have not yet deigned to film). The SoMa shooting, though, turned out to just be the first of the day. Alexander Apalit, 21, was killed at around 9:15 p.m. Saturday at Otsego and Santa Ynez Avenues in Mission Terrace (where, again, there is no Google street view).

Anyone with any information on the murders is urged to call the police at (415) 575-4444.

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Homeless, Edwardians, Very Old People Mix at '06 Quake Commemoration

Posted By on Mon, Apr 20, 2009 at 12:01 AM

Quake survivors William Del Monte, 103, and Rose Cliver, 106. No, they don't let you wear a hat like that until you turn 100. - ALL PHOTOS   |   JOE ESKENAZI
  • All Photos | Joe Eskenazi
  • Quake survivors William Del Monte, 103, and Rose Cliver, 106. No, they don't let you wear a hat like that until you turn 100.

As a convoy of archaic fire trucks led by an ethereally beautiful convertible Jaguar -- of the vintage that Isadora Duncan may or may not have died within it -- turned from McAllister onto Market, the old emergency vehicle's sirens began to wail. It was not quite 5 a.m., and the homeless men snoring on crushed cardboard boxes blearily shook their heads and grumbled.

Those sleeping in the streets exactly 103 years earlier also had an unwelcome pre-dawn wake-up call when the city tumbled down upon their heads before proceeding to burn to the ground.

Every April 18, a commemoration of the great quake of 1906 is held at Lotta's Fountain at 5:12 a.m. -- the fatal hour. Naturally, the 2006 celebration drew throngs of the historically minded out at this ungodly hour to witness centenarian quake survivors flirting with Mayor Gavin Newsom. Newsom wasn't there this year -- a shame, as it'd be intriguing to see what his hair looks like at that time of day, and speculate what time he had to arise to get it that way -- and the survivor count is down to just a pair. The crowd was smaller too, and was populated by the folks who usually show up to events such as these: City employees, history buffs, people who enjoy dressing in costume, and homeless people who happened to be on-scene.

Since you folks probably didn't feel like getting up at the crack of dawn (we know; we didn't see you there), enjoy a few photos of this year's commemoration. Maybe we'll see you there next year -- if you go, perhaps we'll let you take the photos.
 

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