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Friday, February 20, 2009

Supervisor John Avalos' Triple Word Score

Posted By on Fri, Feb 20, 2009 at 7:30 AM

District 11 residents should be comforted that Supervisor John Avalos knows all 22 of the acceptable words with "Q" and no "U"
  • District 11 residents should be comforted that Supervisor John Avalos knows all 22 of the acceptable words with "Q" and no "U"
When it comes to decor, Supervisor John Avalos' office has his standard issue City and County of San Francsico calendar ... and that's it. Far in the corner of the barren room is a small shelf tightly packed with LPs; he notes he's been playing The Cramps incessantly since Lux died. All told, it's the kind of conspicuously empty room that makes one think the first words out of Avalos' mouth to a visitor should be, "She left me, Joe. She took everything. I ... I got a letter."

Thankfully, that's not the case. He just hasn't had much time for decor. He has had time for Scrabble, though. Avalos' letters were hidden on his desk, but we'll curry favor with the supe and reveal that his opponent's hand is O-U-E-E-G-E-I.

That's a strange collection of words Avalos and his loyal opposition have thrown up on the board. But it's perfect for a short, dramatic exchange between the supervisor and his former employer:

NUTTERS!

By Joe Eskenazi

Act I


Chris Daly: I saw you aced that last hearing, John. It must be great to be John Avalos these days.

John Avalos: It's a life, Chris. Some days you sail through, some days the big guy drops a deuce on ya.

Daly: Tell me about it! One often falters after accusing you-know-who of being a coke fiend.

Avalos: But at least you didn' t apologize for it; I hate when folks hem and haw after calling out their colleagues'  completely unsubstantiated drug use. By the way -- is your hand (dramatic pause) O-U-E-E-G-E-I?

Daly: Holy shit! That's amazing? How did you know that?

Avalos: See what happens when you return SF Weekly's calls?

Exit, stage left.

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Bio:
Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.

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