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Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Feds: Cut-Rate Computer Seller Accused of Cutting Customers' Promised Rebates

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 3:35 PM

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In a suit filed yesterday in San Francisco's U.S. District Court, the Federal Trade Commission accused Market Development Specialists of offering $20-to-$150 rebates it won't pay out.

The Indiana-based company buys and resells computers and equipment via institutions such as Office Depot, Buy.com and others. The feds alledge in the suit that MDC even inked an "Assurance of Voluntary Compliance" with the state of Indiana

in which the company promised to "

Process all timely requests to deliver rebates within eight weeks of receiving a properly completed rebate request." (At this point, company president John Levy would break down and confess to several unrelated crimes ... if this were Perry Mason).

The feds request "restitution and disgorgement of ill-gotten gains."

You can read the suit here.




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Just Gators Being Gators: Bonnie Noshes on Claude's Claw

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 12:27 PM

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Would it have been tasteless to name this cold-blooded killer Dan White?

Claude, the California Academy of Science's albino alligator, will have a bit of trouble flipping anyone the bird for a while.

The pale fella has apparently suffered a bite on the "pinky" from his tank-mate Bonnie (Bonnie and Claude? Am I missing something here?).

Like Los Angelinos tailgating in the parking lots of In-N-Outs, this, apparently, is what gators do to one another. Still, Claude will be moved to his own tank tomorrow so he can be examined and treated in the event of an infection.

I guess even the Academy of Sciences is experiencing white flight to the 'burbs.

Photo   |   Ingrid Taylar

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There's a World Going On Underground: Creepy S.F. Tunnels Latest Fodder For History Channel

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 11:58 AM

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Amidst the deluge of End-of-Days, Nostradamus junk that seems to take up the lion's share of the History Channel's programming these days (whatever happened to The Hitler Channel?) San Francisco made an appearance -- not that you'd recognize it.

The weapons depots, nuclear missile silos, and the vast network of tunnels beneath our feet are the current stamping ground for "Cities of the Underground" hosted by Don Wildman (Don, do you need to still note that you were the Sprint Dime-a-Minute Guy and an Oreo pitchman in your bio? You have a show on quasi-basic cable crawling around in subterranean tunnels! How cool is that?).

Local blog Laughing Squid notes that its contributor, John Law, serves as Wildman's tour guide.

According to The History Channel's Web site, the San Francisco episode next airs on Thursday, Jan. 15 at 11 p.m. on local channel 62.

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Alan Lew, One of San Francisco's Great Rabbis, Dies at 65

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 10:40 AM

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In my old job of writing for the city's Jewish newspaper, the standard M.O. for banging out a problem story was "Call five rabbis and see what they think."

Some rabbis picked up a reputation for saying foolish things. Others could be counted on to lose their temper. Others earned reps for happily talking about subjects they knew little about. And a select cadre would always have itelligent and thoughtful things to say -- and make you feel proud that you were lucky enough to interact with such people on a day-to-day basis.

Alan Lew was one of those. The longtime former rabbi at Conservative Beth Sholom just off Park Presidio apparently collapsed and died while taking a jog yesterday at a spiritual retreat. He was only 65.

Within the religious community, Lew was best known for returning to Judaism after becoming an ordained Buddhist priest; he founded a meditation center at his synagogue that survives him. In the greater community, however, Lew was a vocal advocate for the homeless, poor, and afflicted. He routinely led vigils at the gates of San Quentin to protest the death penalty.

Lew was a fundamentally kind and decent man who spent his life making San Francisco a better place. He epitomizes the old Jewish refrain: "May his memory be a blessing."


Photo   |   Brian Geller


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Veteran Bay Area Journo David Weir Laid Off from New Media Site

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 8:30 AM

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Yikes.

That was the collective reaction in the newsroom here at SF Weekly when we heard that David Weir, one of the deans of Bay Area journalism, had been laid off from the Web site Predictify. Weir's news-business credentials are sterling: His past gigs include investigative reporter at Rolling Stone, Editor in Chief at 7x7 magazine, managing editor for Salon.com, executive vice president at KQED, and managing editor of Mother Jones. He was also executive director and co-founder of the Center for Investigative Reporting (CIR).

Most recently, Weir (pictured with former student Michelle Won) was working at Predictify, a quirky site that invites readers to predict trends in current events. On Thursday he was laid off, according to a somber set of entries on his personal blog. Weir says he loved the job and wishes the company well, with or without him.

It's no secret that print news is in dire straits. The stock price of the New York Times Co., owner of the world's most estimable daily newspaper, fell by 50 percent in 2008. But Weir's predicament brings the doom and gloom down to a personal, and more poignant, scale. If a guy like this can't keep his job in the media landscape of 2009, then who, exactly, does the evolving news business have room for? And what kind of stories will they produce?

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Is Blinky, The Simpsons' Three-Eyed Fish, Headed For San Francisco?

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 8:00 AM

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Blinky, the three-eyed fish from the animated television sitcom The Simpsons, may be headed for the San Francisco Bay and its estuaries, according SF Weekly's reading of new research from the University of California at Davis. Wholesale dumping of toxic chemicals into waterways -- such as the gunk disgorged in Springfield ponds by nuclear power plant owner Monty Burns -- has led to a new type of San Francisco Bay zombie fish, with a shrunken brain and misshapen body, according to a study in the Nov. 24 issue of the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

The toxic mix of pesticides, industrial chemicals and flame retardants Bay Area residents have long wantonly dumped into the bay and delta is passed from mother bass to fingerlings during gestation, scientists reported. As a result, the weeuns have undeveloped brains, are sluggish, runtish, and have livers that don't work right, the report said.

In the Nov., 1990 Simpsons episode "Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes on Every Fish," Bart and Lisa Simpson catch a three-eyed fish downstream from Mr. Burns' plant. The press nicknames the fish "Blinky," and a state investigation reveals numerous violations by Burns. Given the scant time the episode devotes to explaining the science behind this multiple-eye deformation, it's unclear whether it could be caused by contaminants found in the San Francisco Bay.

Notwithstanding, SF Bay-borne chemicals such as polybrominated diphenyl ethers, polychlorinated biphenyls, and the pesticides chlorpyrifos and dieldren, are known to cause skeletal, hormonal, and organ deformities in young and adult organisms. When the effects are combined, these effects can increase by several orders of magnitude, according to U.C. Davis researcher David Ostrach.

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San Francisco Giants Make Their Sales Pitch -- And It's Zito-Esque

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 7:00 AM

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As baseball fans, I think we can all agree that Tim Lincecum is spectacular. Even homeless men told me last year that the Giants were too painful to follow -- this coming from men who have slept on pavement for 30 years -- but they still peered through the fence when the Cy Young Award winner pitched.

Unfortunately, the team's sales pitch regarding their young prodigy is something like this: "So, you like Tim Lincecum, right? Everyone likes Tim Linceum. So, are you interested in ... some term life insurance? How about an old Ford Taurus? Some candy corn?"

Last year, like many others, I bought "K-Zone" tickets for Giants games. And why not? It was a spectacular deal. Imagine Lincecum -- the league's strikeout king -- whiffed 12 batters in his previous start. At his next home appearance, you could get 12 bucks off certain tickets (but only if you asked for it, special). It was possible to watch the National League's best pitcher for as little as $4.

I don't remember leaving my phone number when I bought those tickets, but the team did call me up. The Giants representative was awfully candid with me, so I'll give him an assumed name -- Manfred.
 

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Like Football? Good at Glad-Handing? Want a Boss Who Enjoys Dropping His Pants in Crowds? Come Work For the 49ers!

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 6:25 AM

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Can you put a good spin on this? Then answer the Niners' ad!

Do you have a degree in journalism? Do you have at least eight years as a public relations professional? Are you a skilled public speaker? And do you enjoy working around men who disrobe in front of the media and are led by a man who disrobed in front of them?

Well then what are you waiting for? The San Francisco 49ers need a new director of football public relations -- could it be you? Apply here!

The first three questions heading this article are noted on the job application form. The one about disrobing will likely be asked behind closed doors. Also worth querying: Are you discrete? One of the prior holders of this job, Kirk Reynolds, made headlines of the wrong sort in 2005 when a video he'd produced in-house was leaked to the general public -- who couldn't help but notice the broad, fratboy-esque homosexual jokes and Niners trainer George Chung wearing giant buck teeth, speaking in a Most Honorable Houseboy accent, and claiming his name is "Suck Hung."

So, don't do that. The 49ers are a class organization.

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Grave Robbery in San Francisco: Protesters Evoke Oscar Grant's Bloody Corpse to Flog their Causes in Gaza, Greece, and God Knows What Else

Posted By on Tue, Jan 13, 2009 at 5:20 AM


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Two protesters, nine photographers. This is a problem.

The Prison-Industrial Complex or the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy or whatever form The Man is assuming these days can rest easy in his bed. That's because the rabble-rousing radical left (aka white kids from the East Bay wearing hankies over their faces) can't stay on point.

Monday night's Civic Center protest was supposed to be about 22-year-old Oscar Grant, shot dead by a BART cop on New Year's Day. From there, it morphed into how we're all living in a police state. From there, naturally, pro-Palestinian chants rang out. And from there, somehow, it was tied in to whatever the hell is going on in Greece. In other words, this was a bald-faced, callous exploitation of Grant's tragic death to raise some hell, chant incoherently into a bullhorn, and tell some cops on their best behavior -- who everyone knew wouldn't lift a finger -- to go fuck themselves.

Of course, that's not how the protesters see it. "This struggle is a global struggle. This is not just about Oscar Grant," said one speaker. "The whole problem is connected to people in Palestine and people in Greece being violated," added another. "The media is covering this up!" ranted yet another speaker as eight TV trucks idled nearby and two helicopters hovered overhead.

I didn't get the chance to write down much in my notebook -- I was standing a good eight feet away from the speakers and most of them seemed to have trouble operating the bullhorn. But one fellow did, unmistakably, say that this is "the richest country in America," while another noted that "If I went out and killed someone today, I'd be immediately arrested for murder" -- showing he really doesn't know much about the San Francisco Police Department.
  

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