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Monday, February 25, 2008

City misplaces prostitutes while Chris Daly sets your fonts for you! It's ...

Posted By on Mon, Feb 25, 2008 at 10:54 AM


By Benjamin Wachs

Monday, Feb. 25

10 a.m. – Public Safety Committee

In addition to examining why there are so many homicides and what we’re doing about it, today’s Public Safety Committee hearing will ask: where have all the flowers gone?

1 p.m. – Land Use & Economic Development Committee

Lots of important stuff on the agenda today, including two omnibus rezoning measures, for parts of Market Street, that I’m convinced no one has ever read. This has been on various committees’ agendas for so long that I’m starting to think no one ever will, either.

But you can expect lots of people to read Chris Daly’s new proposal that people who want to sell rental properties need to inform their tenants of their rights, in writing, before the property gets sold – and that people who buy rental properties need to give their tenants a written notification of all their rights after it’s sold, too.

That’s a lot of paperwork. I was going to make a joke about how at least Daly didn’t specify what font the notices need to be written in, but, in fact, it’s at least 12 points and bold type.

Meanwhile six supervisors (Peskin, Ammiano, Daly, Maxwell, Mirkarimi, and Sandoval) have put their names on a measure that would limit the conversion of large tourist hotels into condominiums. Hmmmm … tourists or condo owners … how does a good progressive decide who to root for?

12 p.m. - Government Audit and Oversight Committee

I’d tell you this committee doesn’t need to meet at all, but, dammit, SOMEBODY has to review the city’s “First Offender Prostitute Program.”

Hard as it is to believe, nobody’s been keeping track. When you think of how many whores have fallen below the radar …

Okay, seriously, this is not a joke – they’ll be calling in a budget analyst because apparently no one knows where all the money for rehabilitating prostitutes has gone.

It’s not a joke … but it sure is funny.

Tuesday, Feb. 26, 2 p.m. – Full Board of Supervisors

“I’m just a bill, yes I’m only a bill, and I’m sitting here on Capitol Hill …”

Most of the agenda items before the Board of Supervisors are so old they can

tell you about Woodstock. Here are a few of our recurring favorites that might actually get voted on this week:

• A new three year contract for MTA rent-a-cops. They’ll be provided by King Security Services. Armed guards will make $27.73 an hour (up by a little over $3), and unarmed guards will make $18.95 an hour (down by almost $5 – apparently people cut your pay if you don’t carry guns). Total value of the contract: $17,100,000.

• The Taxicab “gate fare increase” now has Alioto-Pier, Peskin, and Sandoval’s names on it. I’m not sure where Sandoval came from, but it looks like cab companies will be able to charge self-employed drivers an extra $5 (from $91.50 to $96.50) every time they take a cab out … and be able to add an additional $7.50 to that if it’s a low-emissions vehicle. Because environmentalism is just no good unless it hurts somebody a little more.

• Ross Mirkarimi and Gerardo Sandoval are still trying to get the public defender access to city security camera recordings. Dammit, if only the U.S. had some kind of constitution that covered issues like this …

• $50,000 will be moved from the Golden Gate Park Stables Project nobody wants to the Golf Course Recreational Study nobody wants.

• Chris Daly continues to try and shake down the Treasure Island Development Authority for more affordable housing. Question: does he have to inform them of their rights, in writing, before he does that?

New business mostly consists of determining that the City Hall Legislative Chambers need to be altered to make the Clerk of the Board and President of the Board’s desks handicapped accessible.

Wednesday, Feb. 27, 1 p.m. – Budget and Finance Committee

Wait wait wait … let me get this straight … San Francisco has a Budget and Finance Committee? How’d I miss that?

Thursday, Feb. 28

10 a.m. – Rules Committee

Some things sail through the Rules Committee easily – like the proposal to force Chain Restaurants to provide nutritional information for their menu items. Everybody wants that, because everybody assumes that people who eat at Chain Restaurants are too stupid to know what they’re doing.

Michela Alioto-Pier’s proposals to make San Francisco’s bureaucracy easier to navigate for film producers is likewise kind of a no-brainer, but in a good way. Why not make the system easier to navigate? Film producers are much too stupid to know what they’re doing.

But Alioto-Pier’s proposal to repeal the rule allotting the Mayor time to appear before the Board of Supervisors? Oh, that’s going to generate heat. There’s no doubt Newsom wants this badly … having the rule in place only highlights the fact that he refuses to meet with the Supes in any formal capacity. And there’s no doubt other members of the board are going to use this to paint a giant target on his chest yet again.

Is it just me, or does the mayor’s office spend more time scheduling than it does governing? I’m just asking. It’s not a complaint. By all means, play to your strengths.

1 p.m. – City Operations and Neighborhood Services Committee

There will be not one, not two, not three, but four Landmark Tree Designations today. But, of course, to us, every tree is a Landmark Tree.

A little more controversial might be the hearing called by Supes McGoldrick and Elsbernd … now there’s a pairing you don’t see every day … to go over the budget analyst’s report on the Mayor’s raiding the coffers of other city departments to pay for his staff.

That tangy, beefy, smell? That’s accountability. It’s all OVER this hearing.

Take THAT, landmark trees!

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Benjamin Wachs


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