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Friday, June 5, 2015

This Week: Pharrell Extinguishes Kim K, Taylor Swift Walks Backwards, and Florence Welch Gets Witchy

Posted By on Fri, Jun 5, 2015 at 9:00 AM

This week has been a particularly hazardous one for women's health. Between Annie Clark falling off a speaker stack, Florence Welch dabbling in witchcraft, Taylor Swift climbing down a mountain backwards, and Kim Kardashian setting herself on fire, it's been seven days of living dangerously. Not helping matters is the misogynist abuse being heaped on female civilians by the likes of Mark Kozelek and (allegedly) Chris Brown. At least Ed Sheeran knows how to make fun of people over-using the word "bitch"... Here are the Quotes of the Week:

  • Instagram / Kim Kardashian

"Shout out to Pharrell & Helen who saved my life last night! LOL After the awards at dinner the feathers of my dress caught on fire from a candle & they jumped on me to get it out!"
Pharrell Williams saved Kim Kardashian West from being on fire. He really IS the nicest man in music. (Instagram)

"Patrick, security guard at Tennessee Theater in Knoxville, likely saved my life tonight. #cutsbutnoconcussions #emt #300lbspeakercollapse… More importantly, Patrick is also ok. Thank god."
Annie “St Vincent” Clark fell off the side of a speaker stack and Patrick shielded her from the falling weight. Thanks Patrick! (Twitter)

  • Taylor Swift / Tumblr
"I saw the guy with the camera and wasn’t in the mood so I hiked the whole trail backwards and my security told me when to make turns... Ah, the tranquility of the great outdoo-TAYLORCANYOULOOKOVERHEREGIVEUSASMILEAREYOUDAT"
Taylor Swift hiked down a mountain backwards to avoid having a photo taken of her face. (Tumblr)

"We got really into obsessing about the LA witchcraft scene, and I was imagining this concept album about a witch trial in Hollywood, and someone falls in love."
Florence and the Machine's new album was almost about witches in Los Angeles. K. (NME)

“I've had a different creative change of heart… On top of that, mentally, to be honest with you, I just feel I deserve a break.”
Iggy Azalea canceled an upcoming tour because she deserves it, you guys. (Seventeen)

"If the Foos could release a Dischord single, then we could break up. Done deal!"
Dave Grohl on the fact that he’s been trying to get signed to Dischord Records since the age of 14. (NME)

"What is your old ass doing here anyway? I like to have the help be people I’d actually like to fuck.’”
US Weekly is claiming — and Chris Brown is denying — that Chris Brown said this to a flight attendant. (It DOES sound like something Chris Brown would say...)

"There's a girl named Laura Snapes. She's a journalist. She's out to do a story on me... I wrote a little song about her. Here's the chorus: 'Laura Snapes totally wants to fuck me, get in line bitch, Laura Snapes totally wants to fuck me...'" 
Mark Kozelek verbally degraded a music journalist onstage this week, because she had the gall to try to interview him. (Tumblr)

"Kozelek trades in sucker punches... He can use sexually violent language to reduce female critics to the status of groupies, knowing that while male musicians’ misogynist acts are examined for nuance and defended as traits of “difficult” artists, women and those who call them out are treated as hysterics who don’t understand art."
Then Laura Snapes subsequently destroyed Mark Kozelek in print form. (The Guardian)

Ed Sheeran’s Ty Dolla $ign cover: a shiny beacon of light, showing up how ridiculous over-using the word "bitch" is...
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