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Thursday, September 20, 2012

Fiona Apple Arrest Shows Why No One Should Ever Leave California

Posted By on Thu, Sep 20, 2012 at 12:56 PM

Fiona at the Warfield in the happier days of last week.
  • Fiona at the Warfield in the happier days of last week.

Update, 5:09 p.m.: Apple spent the night in jail but is now out on a $10,000 bond, according to TMZ. The site says she "freely admitted" that the hash and weed were hers.

Original post: In a shocking reminder of the existence of anti-marijuana laws, famed singer Fiona Apple was arrested in Texas yesterday after police say they found a small amount of hashish (a concentrated form of pot, but you knew that) on her tour bus.

The singer -- who performed at the Warfield in front of red-eyed and hungry San Franciscans only last week -- is currently sitting in the jail of some Texas town that isn't famous for oil, a big music/tech/film festival, or having hosted a cult.

Which just goes to show that no one should ever leave California.

Because we -- ooh, those chips look goo -- oops, sorry: We (cough) are baffled that, in 2012, hardworking Americans are held captive and treated like criminals for enjoying a little tetrahydrocannabinol every once in a while. But as TMZ (which first reported Apple's arrest) notes, authorities in the town of Sierra Blanca, Tex., have previously busted Willie Nelson and Snoop Dogg for packing vegetables.

Still -- what the fuck? Everyone knows that Texas is a few years (okay, decades) behind our times, but is it actually 1952 down there? Would Dennis Hopper still not survive a motorcycle trip through the backwoods? Considering her arrest, pot might turn out be one of Fiona's lesser problems: If those hillbilly cops start reading her lyrics, they'll probably try to put her on trial for witchcraft.

See also:

Live Review, 9/11/12: Fiona Apple Hurts For Her Public at the Warfield

Follow us on Twitter @SFAllShookDown, follow Ian S. Port @iPORT, and like us at

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