Tonight, ever-controversial rock 'n' rollers The Pretty Reckless are playing Bottom of the Hill. Say what you will about this quartet and its 18-year-old singer, Taylor Momsen -- they attract an audience way more diverse than most. In case you head down to Bottom of the Hill for the former Gossip Girl actress' band tonight, here's a round-up of the seven types of people you should expect to find there.
1. Fucked Up Teenage Girls
Or at the very least, teenage girls who think it's glamorous and interesting to be look fucked up and/or dress like underage hookers. Like this:
was rolling around in oil, wearing nothing but bikinis and chaps, and
thrusting at everyone and everything in her general vicinity. Momsen's
whole approach to teenage whore-dom (to name check a Hole song) is much darker. She looks like a girl Marilyn Manson
would roll around with in one of his sexy videos -- and there are
plenty of girls who aspire to do such things. Tonight, the teens who
aspire to be dark and sexy and inappropriate will be out in droves. Try
not to stare at their bras and garter belts -- it only encourages them.
2. People Who Like Their Rock Straightforward
We really hate to admit this, and yes, it doesn't happen often, but occasionally The Pretty Reckless write a song with a killer chorus. Go ahead, hit play on "Miss Nothing." It starts out exactly as you'd imagine -- totally obvious, a bit cringe-worthy... and then the chorus hits. Sure, it ain't gonna change the world, but think of it this way: if Juliette Lewis put this out, we'd all think it was fine.
3. Gossip Girl Fans
making her own decisions and living her life. Which is all well and good, but any responsible, more mature gentlemen out there will tell you that being in a room full of underage and barely legal girls clad in stockings with their bras out is more than likely going to make for an awkward and confusing evening. Even more sad, Taylor was parading herself around like this well before she turned 18. To say there are daddy issues and parental figure problems would be a
giant understatement.
5. People Who Like Folksy Ballads
For all of the cigarette smoking, black eyeliner, mean faces and PVC, The Pretty Reckless actually have some lovely, accessible tunes for anyone who likes a good cry to a good acoustic ballad with string quartet enhancements. Watch the above video (or another one, "Just Tonight," perhaps) if you don't believe us.
6. Concerned Local Mothers
You can hear them now. "Well, I just don't understand it. She used to be such a nice television character and now she's all dressed in black and, gosh, she looks a bit dangerous. I think she might be on drugs. Why are her eyes droopy like that? I bet it's drugs! Of course, I have to let [insert name of offspring here] go to the concert. I don't want to be an overbearing parent. But I'll just go and stand at the back. That's fair, isn't it? That way, I can step in if there's any trouble." There will be at least three of these parents present at the back of the room, sipping water and looking awkward.
7. Warped Tour Kids
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