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Thursday, October 11, 2007

The Vodka Drip, The Sherry Enema, And Other Tales Of Unconventional Alcohol Consumption

Posted By on Thu, Oct 11, 2007 at 12:29 PM

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Picture this: It's just another night out at the bars, and after about the sixth beer, you're thinking: goddamn, I'm tired of just plain old drinking. There's got to be another way to ingest this alcohol and keep my buzz going!

Our friends over at the Grinder point out one answer: the vodka drip. It seems Australian doctors recently saved a man's life after a botched suicide attempt by pumping him full of intravenous vodka (it gives a whole new meaning to the acronym IV don't it?) For three days in the ICU, the patient was drip-fed the hard stuff to the tune of about three standard drinks an hour, as an antidote to the poison he swallowed. According to doctors, the hangover had worn off by the time the man woke up.

Which brings us to the other, arguably more user-friendly route: the alcohol enema. The Houston Chronicle reports that negligent homicide charges were dropped last week against a woman who's husband died after she gave him a sherry enema. Did they run out of Pinot or something? The autopsy found that she'd pumped him full of enough sherry to raise his blood alcohol level to a staggering 0.47 percent, nearly six times the legal driving limit.

The beleaguered wife-cum-ass-bartender says that her boozy hubby had been addicted to enemas ever since his mother administered them as a child. "He did coffee enemas, he did Castile soap, Ivory soap ... He had enema recipes."

Enema recipes you say? Yes, they do exist. Mmm, milk and honey.

-- Brian Bernbaum

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Brian Bernbaum

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