Get SF Weekly Newsletters
Pin It

The Idea List 

Wednesday, Feb 11 2009

A mayoral spokesman recently explained that Gavin Newsom needed to be at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, because it's where he gets his "innovative ideas." With the city facing a $575 million budget shortfall, what are the Davos-inspired ideas Gavin is likely to unveil in the coming months?

•Bono must plant our next victory garden

•Secede from the U.S., establish a monarchy, print own municipal currency

•Soup kitchens should also serve locally grown organic arugula

•Create mayoral kissing booth: $5 for lip-to-lip, $10 for a little tongue action

•Steal Marin's lunch money

•Create a new job training program to help S.F.'s most poor and destitute become hedge fund managers  

•Instead of giving the next state-of-the-city address over 7.5 hours on YouTube, hire Bill Clinton to do it 

•Wear a helmet cam to the marital bed for pay-per-view spectaculars

•Steal Bill Gates' credit card, use it to pay off city deficit

•Fund a new "community court" specifically to handle the crimes of rich people

•Put Chris Daly up for auction on eBay

•Hire celebrity special-guest mayors to fill in while Newsom campaigns for governor

•Monitor area hospitals for the sucker born every minute

•Sell the Golden Gate Bridge to all the suckers born every minute (hint: We usually see them at Dolores Park)

About The Author

SF Weekly Staff


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Popular Stories

  1. Most Popular Stories
  2. Stories You Missed


  • clipping at Brava Theater Sept. 11
    Sub Pop recording artists 'clipping.' brought their brand of noise-driven experimental hip hop to the closing night of 2016's San Francisco Electronic Music Fest this past Sunday. The packed Brava Theater hosted an initially seated crowd that ended the night jumping and dancing against the front of the stage. The trio performed a set focused on their recently released Sci-Fi Horror concept album, 'Splendor & Misery', then delved into their dancier and more aggressive back catalogue, and recent single 'Wriggle'. Opening performances included local experimental electronic duo 'Tujurikkuja' and computer music artist 'Madalyn Merkey.'"