"The 'How-To' Intensive"
New Langton Arts, 1246 Folsom (at Eighth Street), S.F.
Begins at 8 p.m. on Thursday, April 29 (and runs through Saturday, with the same two-hour program presented each evening)
Admission is $7-10
626-5416
New Langton Arts lampoons the self-enhancement crusade this weekend with "The 'How-To' Intensive," three evenings of educational video installations, computer presentations, and live step-by-step lectures with a bizarrely broad scope of new-to-you skills, from shucking corn to hiring effective employees to cleaning the bottom of a refrigerator.
Take, for instance, San Francisco artist Michael Rich's "If You Love It You Will Set It Free," a talk on the finer points of training house cats to survive in the wild, which leverages his experiences from years of coaching his own pets. Or "How to Make Hair Big in 10 Minutes," a minicourse on follicle fun from Ida Dewey Acton and Serafina Palandech (which we really could have used in the '80s). But the schooling most likely to dazzle attendees is Gennifer M. Hirano's combination video/ live-performance prostitution primer, which teaches participants call-girl tricks like evading police attention and sussing out creepy johns.
The one thing the "Intensive" won't have to explain is how to enjoy yourself at the show.