Epistoned VII: Yeah, but have you seen the stoner parody OUR WARS? ("The Farce Awakens: The Origins of Hardware Wars," Bob Calhoun, 12/17/15). Darth Gary's Imperial Grow Room? O-town shout outs, beach vibes, it's a classic: "It is a dark time for the Loadies. Harsh marijuana regulations and bullshit 3 Strikes laws have burners in a state of panic. Join Luke Perry and a ragtag band of stoner Rebels, led by Princess Leia, as they seek to overthrow the sinister Federal Drug War and provide inexpensive, high-quality chronic to the entire region..." LoadMeOneKenobi
No Love For Sean Parker: The Adult Use of Marijuana Act leaves all the existing cannabis criminal laws on the books, it just carves out a few exceptions for the chosen few admitted into the new oligopoly and those who posses under an ounce (as long as it isn't in their car) ("Fear and Shouting at the Emerald Cup," Chris Roberts, 12/17/15). This is not legalization. The polls show the public favors legalization of cannabis, not just a little bit of cannabis left in your home. It is time the policy wonks stopped listening to, and trying to appease, all the anti-cannabis camps and truly legalized it. Mendo Bruce
And yet we continue to crawl: Welcome to the dark side of the world wide web. ("Yelper Who Left One Star Review Harassed By Stalker, Who Is Also Stalking Business," Ali Wunderman, The Snitch, 12/18/2015). It is too easy to post a review when the person has never used the company for service. It is too easy to end up responding to lunatics. It's a nightmare scenario: if the service is truly wretched — from a plumber? IMPOSSIBLE! — and you write an accurate review of bad service — well, look out for possible litigation from the company. In the end, the world wide web seems barely worth the effort. steven_torrey
BART dust is special dust: I used a magnet in the bike station. ("The Black Dust You Breathe on BART," Julia Carrie Wong, 12/17/15.) Most of the dust was picked up by the magnet. pdehaan
Doggie Death Care: On Aug. 13, 2015, I dropped off our beloved Sparky at Darlene's Pet Salon in Lake Isabella, Calif. ("This Woman Wants to Regulate California's Risky Pet Grooming Industry," Jeremy Lybarger, 12/17/15.) Two hours later, I picked up his lifeless body from her shop. She told me he had a heart attack and dropped dead. She held me in her arms and said, "Honey, this would have happened even if he was home." Knowing Sparky was in good health, I ordered a necropsy. The result showed Sparky had died of asphyxia. The groomer kept denying her crime until she faced the local CBS channel. She then confessed that Sparky was left alone on grooming table, had jumped and hanged himself. Holly Clark
Der Tasergang: The SFPD does not need another weapon, ("Report: San Francisco, Oakland Among Most Deadly Cities for Police Violence," Chris Roberts, The Snitch, 12/21/15) unless the public is prepared to watch five of them electrocute a man instead of shoot him. kathieyount
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