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Sex and Sensuality 

Touchy-feely “researchers” want to build community through the practice of orgasmic meditation — one stroke at a time

Wednesday, Apr 4 2007
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In a typical orgasmic meditation session, a woman (the strokee) lies down and the stroker (we'll describe the stroker as a man, but it may be a woman instead) will place his right hand under her buttocks and rest his right thumb at her introitus, or the vaginal hole. The stroker will then take lubricant — One Taste recommends its all-natural One Stroke lube — and place it on the forefinger and middle finger of his left hand. Then with a stroke (also known as a lube stroke) he applies it to her clitoris. He then puts his left forefinger on the upper left-hand quadrant of the strokee's clitoris — which they believe is a spot where thousands of nerve endings are bundled. For the strokee, the upper left-hand quadrant is at about the 1:30 p.m. position on a clock.

Now, not everyone buys this whole upper-left hand quadrant theory. Barry Komisaruk, the senior author of The Science of Orgasm, who's also a psychology professor at Rutgers University in New Jersey, said he hasn't seen scientific studies proving that one side of the clitoris is more responsive than the other. After researching the One Taste Web site, he said he wasn't sure what science would be relevant to their practice. "It was very New Agey," Komisaruk said.

One Taste is considering a science-of-orgasm class to explore the topic — and may satisfy nay-sayers along the way. In the meantime, they're eager to press on with their research.

As the preliminary touching and stroking exercises were wrapping up at the recent introductory 10-hour course, a One Taste community member named Sam was waiting in the back of the room, a few jars of the center's One Stroke lubricant in his hand. Then, as OMing veteran Robert Kandell explained the hands-on details of Orgasmic Meditation, a woman named Jessica lay down on her back on a massage table, and spread her legs, butterfly position. Her bent knees rested on pillows.

A timer is set, and for the next 15 minutes, the stroking is on. Up, down. Up, down. Up, down. Up, down.

After putting on latex gloves, Sam began massaging Jessica's inner thighs and lower stomach. He went in for the lube stroke. "If you follow the inner lips, her clit will pop out," Sam said.

At this point, Kandell told the group that the best position to watch an OM demonstration is sitting with legs open, feet planted on the ground.

"Sam's stroke is small, very deliberate," said Daedone, who informed the group that Sam's thumb was a thumbnail deep in Jessica's introitus.

Jessica was already moaning, trembling, sighing, and shaking.

"I'm going to take her up," Sam said.

"Shorter, faster, lighter," Daedone told him.

The group was encouraged to share their own feelings and ask questions, too. One woman said there were chills across her back. "Contractions in my pussy," another said.

"Now he's bringing her down," Daedone said.

Jessica let out a long "Haaaaaa!" just as someone asked her how she felt. Her "Haaaa!" continued for a while before she told the group, "I feel like my pussy is sucking in air!"

There were more ups and downs along the way, complete with head-bobbing and sighs of pleasure. One woman called out that she felt a spaciousness in her head, but she was nearly drowned out by Jessica's "Haaahaaha!" "Ehhh!" and "Uhh!" At points, her hand was shaking so furiously it kept tapping against her chest.

"One more slow peak up!" Daedone said.

"Uh! Uh! Uh!" Jessica moaned. She let out one very long "Ahhhhhh!"

"Hold. And down," Daedone said. "Give her some heavy introital pressure."

As Sam followed with the towel stroke, a key final step to OMing, the practice veterans explained that it's very important to bring the strokee down in order to put her back in her body.

When Jessica did sit up to help answer questions, her lips, cheeks, and chest were flushed. She looked blissfully happy and at peace. Sam was sweating a lot. When someone asked how it felt for him, he said there was a moment where energy in his chest traveled past his "cock," down his legs, and grounded him. "I left like, "Yeah, I'm home,'" he said.


After the demonstration, students joined each other on the floor to eat their lunch, which was spread out on a giant picnic blanket on the floor. One man began eating a brownie off a woman's inner thigh — he later reported that his relationship to brownies was forever changed by the experience. There was kissing. Several people ended up in a pile on the ground, pouring San Pellegrino sparkling water into their mouths and drinking it off each other's chests.

One woman had come to One Taste that day to learn how to be open, to stop pushing others away. Another said she'd come to surrender. A man said he wanted to learn how to feel his emotions. One guy had been looking for a class in personal finance but changed his mind when he spotted the class on "how to handle a woman's pussy."

Whatever brought them there that day, by lunchtime the robe-wearing group seemed to have grown ever closer, both reaching out and offering support to one another.

And it wouldn't be long before they would try OMing for themselves.

Finally the group filtered toward the back of the room. As the women lay down, the men prepared for the next round of obnosing exercises. Only these were different. "Look at her pussy, not her face," Ogin told them.

About The Author

Mary Spicuzza

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