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Bard's Garden Party Center for the Arts throws down the gauntlet to local theater companies every year: to produce a Shakespearean work outdoors, using the Yerba Buena Gardens as a springboard for the action. Latino theater company Luminarias did it last year with a roaming production of A Midsummer Night's Dream that took the audience with it; this year, the African American Shakespeare Company presents the romantic comedy As You Like It as audiences have never seen it, resetting the action in the Reconstruction-era Old South, and transforming the gardens into the Forest of Arden, which in this rendition is inhabited by emancipated slaves. The Dukes are plantation owners here, and Jacques is played by a woman, but director Kathryn Seabron retains Shakepeare's original language in the show, which begins at 5 p.m. (also Sunday, through Sept. 7) at Center for the Arts Yerba Buena Gardens, on Mission between Third and Fourth streets, S.F. Admission is free; call 978-ARTS.
Get 'Stiffed Knockers the Klown is one of many reasons why the Bindlestiff Family Cirkus National Donniker Tour won't be anything like the Ringling Bros. show coming up at the Cow Palace. Knockers, a self-described sexologist and publisher of zines like Peek! For People With a Passion for Panties, offers insight into clown sex with her "Rubber Chicken Twirling Act," a very special attraction at the Autonomadic Bookmobile, a sort of literary midway featuring small press publications. In the world of this Bindlestiff, which has no relation to S.F.'s Bindlestiff Theater Company, family entertainment also includes the "Brother and Sister Bed of Nails Love Act," the sword-swallowing Mr. Pennygaff, Scotty the Blue Bunny's magic act, Philomena's dance on broken glass, and a sundry assortment of jugglers, fire eaters, and trapeze artists. See real live freaks from New York City when the show begins at 11 p.m. (doors at 10 p.m.) at the old Kommotion building, 2779 16th St. (at Folsom), S.F. Admission is $6; call 252-8525.
Cocktail Mix The old folks at Belmont's Pinebrook Inn go wild for the World Accordion to Ottmar, especially when Ottmar breaks into the polka versions of "Pretty Woman" and "I Feel Good." It takes a special kind of crowd to appreciate Ottmar's genius, the kind of crowd that might be found at the third annual Lounge-a-Palooza, where Ottmar will be joined by bands whose musical message doesn't get much deeper than "Have a martini and relax, fer chrissakes." Martin Denny might have appreciated Tipsy's trip-hop spin on lounge, while "Herb," featuring members of Super Diamond, Eskimo, and the Club Foot Orchestra, orchestrates a horn-heavy tribute to Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass with a set of standards including "The Lonely Bull." Sonny Whipp and, finally, the Extranaturals, featuring Mr. Lucky and his lounge twist on Tears for Fears, complete the lineup, at least until each guest takes a turn fronting the Amazing Embarrassonic Human Karaoke Machine, which can accommodate would-be Dean Martins with a 250-plus repertoire of pop, rock, and oldies tunes. Prizes will be awarded for the swankiest outfits; Seattle's Phineas Gage Travelling Sideshow and DJs Bald Elvis, Marlo, and Recliner also entertain. The show begins at 9 p.m. at the Paradise Lounge/Transmission Theater, 1501 Folsom (at 11th Street), S.F. Admission is $11-12; call 621-4410.
sunday
august 24
Juris Impudence Contestants in the Sandra Day O'Connor Look-Alike Contest won't have to suffer through the swimsuit and evening gown rounds, but they will be judged on appearance, poise, talent, and "judicial temperament," which remains wide open to interpretation. The contest, a benefit for the AIDS Legal Referral Panel, maintains a strict non-discrimination policy, meaning that anyone can enter, including women and non-lawyers. Several well-known drag queens are expected to perform at the event, subtitled "the Party of the First Part" -- lawyers are also expected in abundance, and have been encouraged not to perform. The party, which also features an auction of expensive dinners, gym memberships, and permanent hair removal treatments, begins at 4 p.m. at Marlena's Bar, 488 Hayes (at Gough), S.F. Admission is free; call 291-5454.
monday
august 25
Wheel of Fortune England's Catherine Wheel try sneaking up on the widespread acclaim that keeps eluding them with their fifth LP, Adam & Eve, which enlists the aid of Pink Floyd producer Bob Ezrin and Talk Talk keyboardist Tim Friese-Greene. This album's brooding, ethereal style may not suit Catherine Wheel culties expecting the kind of blistering pop and volume-happy production that marked singles like "Way Down" and betrayed the hand of former producer Gil Norton, who also produced the Pixies. Then again, it's not as if Catherine Wheel haven't already had a few quiet moments; in this case, those moments bleed from one song into the next. Catherine Wheel premiere their new album live at 9 p.m. at the Great American Music Hall, 859 O'Farrell, S.F. Admission is $13-15; call 885-0750.
tuesday
august 26
If I Was a Sculptor Cork Marcheschi's oversized rosary, constructed from huge round balls that light up at night, will no doubt thrill lots of art lovers at the third annual Gardens Gallery Walk in Yerba Buena Gardens, although St. Patrick's Church, located across the street from the glow-in-the-dark blasphemy, may be less than enthusiastic. The rosary is among 40 life-sized and larger figurative and abstract sculptures by local artists being installed along the Esplanade prior to, and as part of, the walk, which takes place Sept. 4 throughout the gallery-heavy Yerba Buena neighborhood. Some sculptures will be kinetic, some will have sound, and many will be illuminated from within after sunset. Some, like Armando Rascon's surrealist newsstand, in which all the headlines relate to borders and illegal immigration, will be political by nature. The exhibit opens at sunrise daily on the Yerba Buena Esplanade, on Mission between Third and Fourth streets, S.F. Admission is free; call 541-0312.
