Get SF Weekly Newsletters

People & Places

Least Appropriate Vehicle for San Francisco Driving 

Ford Excursion

Hey! You freaking moron! Your hideous $45,000 behemoth belongs in a Monster Truck Rally with tons of mud, mud, mud -- not on city streets! You can't park in any normal-sized space! In Chinatown and North Beach, people have to pull half off the road so you can pass in the other direction! No one can see past your bulbous fat ass! You get about 8 miles to the gallon, and those gallons cost $2 each! You're in gross violation of the law of natural selection, because you're a moron, but if you get in an accident the other driver will be killed instead of you! Yes, you're a pinhead, and your vehicle makes your head look even smaller by comparison!


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Search Best Of Awards