Social networking company Twitter is threatening to move its offices to Brisbane, Calif., unless San Francisco makes concessions. What concessions is Twitter demanding?
• All new laws must be 140 characters or fewer
• Jane Kim's profile photo should be way hotter
• Willie Brown needs to stop requesting an extra 10 characters for his friends
• The mid-Market area must be renamed "Tweetville"
• The city must provide free translation services for those who wish to read tweets in Spanish, Mandarin, and Tagalog
• A majority of city voters must pass a ballot measure admitting that Facebook is a huge time suck
• David Chiu's tweets need to show some personality
• More money in tax breaks than Twitter could possibly be worth in a rational economy
