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Monday, November 18, 2013

The McRib Might Be Even Grosser Than You Thought

Posted By on Mon, Nov 18, 2013 at 2:30 PM

  • DJDanaK/Reddit

Remember lean finely textured beef, otherwise known as pink slime, which maybe you thought was shamed out of existence but which also made a comeback?

Well, another commonly consumed meat product, the McRib, got some unwanted attention on Reddit the other day. A wayward Mickey D's employee snapped a photo of one in its pre-cooked, or larval, phase. Naked as the day God made it (or maybe naked as the night the extrusion device pumped it from the slurry vat), it looks like a fragment of tread from around the wheels of a tank. It's also white. Not a crusted-with-freezer-ice kind of white; a blanched and ill-looking kind, like E.T.'s skin when he goes into cardiac arrest.

See also: Surprise: Chicken Nuggets Contain Gross Ingredients

Surprisingly, Esquire of all places had very little problem with this, and even commended McDonald's for its attempt at verisimilitude, with the fake-rib texture. Everyone harbors a guilty pleasure, and you can't really blame some people for getting excited for when the McRib makes its annual return. Even fancy men's magazines.

But the important point isn't that the McRib is a gross-tasting fat delivery vehicle, or even that the patty contains propyl gallate and the bun has azodicarbonamide and something called DATEM. It's that we must always be conscious that McDonald's dominates its business, which is selling absolute garbage (while screwing its employees) and it should never be trusted. The McRib looks like that because that's what shaving every last hundredth of a penny off the production cost looks like. These is the company whose salads can have almost as much fat and sodium as a Big Mac.

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Pete Kane

Pete Kane

Pete Kane is a total gaylord who is trying to get to every national park before age 40


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