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Friday, September 16, 2011

Vegetarians Love Doing It, True Blood's Pam Loves Chimps, and Easiest/Best Chocolate Mousse Recipe Ever!

Posted By on Fri, Sep 16, 2011 at 2:00 PM


Cargill recalled 185,000 pounds of their Salmonella turkey this week! Yet another fabulous Cargill recall this year! What can I say? They're on a roll! And again, another exemplary job by the USDA. Did you know USDA has a website where you can ask them questions? Let's all ask them WHY THE FUCK THIS KEEPS HAPPENING?? God, if real businesses were run like this, they'd be shut down and imprisoned. But you know, all government agencies get a free pass because... they're government agencies. Don't think too much about it, it's Un-American!

• Vegetarians love giving head, according to science-ish. Maybe lack of fish in the diet? GOD SO GROSS SORRY. Anyway, OKCupid's findings are only talking about vegetarians, it doesn't even begin to tackle how filthy vegans are. We love hot dog whipped cream pies, if you know what I'm saying. Because I don't. Point is: go vegan and someone comes to your house and gives you a blow job.

• Cling to the end of summer with FatFree Vegan's Thai Salad with Slow-Cooked Tofu in Pineapple Barbecue Sauce.

Food safety officials will will ban the sale of ground beef tainted with six toxic strains of E. coli. It's about mickey fickey time! Shit! Question: Is it only GROUND beef that counts? Because that shiz shows up elsewhere. Also, best part is, this doesn't go into effect until March so if you die from it before them, OH WELLS. "The amount this is going to cost is insignificant compared to the lives that will be saved," said Senator Kirsten E. Gillibrand, Democrat of New York, who pushed for the expanded rule. She's also the mastermind behind the bill "to amend the Federal Meat Inspection Act so that the term 'adulterated' includes emerging pathogens 'associated with actual or potential human illnesses or death, including at minimum pathogens such as antibiotic-resistant strains of Salmonella or enterohemorrhagic (EHEC) Shiga toxin-producing serotypes of E. coli.'" Love her, love everything about her, let's all write her love letters and sign them from me. You do the work, I take the credit. It's the American Way!

San Francisco has fewer vegans than Dallas? THAN DALLAS? Uh, sure Living Social, I totally trust you and your team of scientists marketers.

• No more eating a steak because you're visiting your sister in BFE and there isn't a Cafe Gratitude. Where there is a mall, there is vegan food! Quarrygirl makes it easier for all of us to be veg at PF Changs, Cheesecake Factory, and Hungry Hunter! Okay, maybe just those first two. If you're at a Hungry Hunter, GET OUT. This isn't 1982!

• Melodi Donahue, beautiful genius behind OCD Caramels, the truly delicious and unique gourmet vegan caramels has an excellent interview with her adorable self in the Napa Valley Register. Of course, we shoulda gotten that interview so I'm just linking to someone who did my job for me. And I wonder why I'm flat broke! Worst freelancer EVER.

This is NOT what vegan means. Trust me. Further: ROWR.

• I just think that this pudding looks really great. Like, I'd murder someone for it. Okay, maybe not that, but i'd do a strip tease in the middle of rush hour traffic for it. Some people would probably rather murder than walk through traffic naked, but mama likes to let loose! Plus, THE BEST. Anyway, since there's no recipe, this is a really good and easy vegan pudding/mousse that you must make immediately. Oh! And then top it with Healthy Top vegan whipped cream because G'DAMN!

• Liz Lovely makes the best vegan cookies and their store was wrecked in Hurricane Irene. Help them (and your waistline! Fat is IT!) by buying all their cookies. ALL OF THEM.

7-11s all over the east coast are selling some jazzy looking vegan foods. My friends to the east, please buy these so that we might eventually sell them here and then I'll never have to go to Berkeley Bowl ever again. Please.

• Kristin Bauer, who plays Pam, the most amazing character on True Blood, who incidentally, is also one of the best characters on TV of all time ever, voices her support for the Great Ape Protection and Cost Savings Act. Love it. Also, you gotta watch the video, it's of lab chimps seeing sunlight for the first time in their lives. They hug each other, it's so overwhelming. It's the goddamned most beautiful thing I've ever see and I own a mirror and look like me, know what I'm saying?

Laura Beck is a founding editor of Vegansaurus! and tweets at mrpenguino.
Follow SFoodie on Twitter: @SFoodie, and like us on Facebook.

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Laura Beck


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