Get SF Weekly Newsletters

Friday, June 11, 2010

How to Seduce ― and Then Dump ― a Vegan

Posted By on Fri, Jun 11, 2010 at 6:19 PM

click to enlarge Club Waziema: Perfect pre-sex date place? - BSTAR/FLICKR
  • Bstar/Flickr
  • Club Waziema: Perfect pre-sex date place?
Our favorite morsel from the Web.

The Bold Italic's Laura Beck offers a date-by-date restaurant guide to landing, shagging, and then dumping a vegan boy ― not since Tablehopper's book has there been such a sassy tweaking of the restaurant tipster form. Beck:

The first step that begins the running leap into a vegan's crotch starts with a first date. If you live each day like it's your rocking last (strongly advised), you probably assume you need to take a vegan to Millennium to get the panties dropping. You'd be wrong. That's the kind of crazy-ass first date move that ends in a restraining order or a marriage to an equally crazy-crazy. Either way, you don't want that. You need to ease in with some trips to off-the-beaten-path hidden gems with good veg options.
See? Sass.

Beck's narrative through city staging grounds of animal-free lust starts at Old Jerusalem, moves on to Udupi Palace, Waziema, and Saha, before souring harder than a quart of weeks-old udder milk in the perfect break-up zone of ― well, we'll let Beck reveal that. Sheesh: For a people who shun cruelty as applied to veal calves, vegans can sure relish the kill when it comes to doofus boys they've grown tired of.

Follow us on Twitter: @SFoodie. Contact me at

  • Pin It

Tags: , , , ,


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Popular Stories

  1. Most Popular Stories
  2. Stories You Missed

Like us on Facebook


  • clipping at Brava Theater Sept. 11
    Sub Pop recording artists 'clipping.' brought their brand of noise-driven experimental hip hop to the closing night of 2016's San Francisco Electronic Music Fest this past Sunday. The packed Brava Theater hosted an initially seated crowd that ended the night jumping and dancing against the front of the stage. The trio performed a set focused on their recently released Sci-Fi Horror concept album, 'Splendor & Misery', then delved into their dancier and more aggressive back catalogue, and recent single 'Wriggle'. Opening performances included local experimental electronic duo 'Tujurikkuja' and computer music artist 'Madalyn Merkey.'"