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Friday, October 23, 2015

David Spade is Quite Interesting

Posted By on Fri, Oct 23, 2015 at 8:00 AM

click to enlarge Comedian David Spade appears at Cobb's Comedy Club on Nov. 3. - PHOTO BY BRIAN BOWEN SMITH
  • Photo by Brian Bowen Smith
  • Comedian David Spade appears at Cobb's Comedy Club on Nov. 3.

In today's age of overhyped celebrities with new creative projects, apps and selfies that you simply must check out, it's refreshing when a true comedic talent like David Spade exercises a little humility in titling his memoir David Spade is Almost Interesting.  But don't buy this Saturday Night Live alum's false modesty for one moment. Also known for Just Shoot Me, Joe Dirt and Grown Ups, Spade, who's currently making airwaves on truTV's hit series Fameless, has starred in his own personal melodrama for the last 51 years and isn't shy about dishing it in his new book, out Oct. 27. SF Weekly spoke to David Spade, who appears at Cobb's Comedy Club on Nov. 3, about his new memoir, pissing off Eddie Murphy and which celebrity family he's just itching to trash.

Why write a memoir now?

I guess it has come up before when I was on Just Shoot Me. Comedians were doing books, so I thought I might. But when I found out how long of a process it is, I said I don't have much to say. Now a little more time has passed and I'm not on a TV show, so I thought now would be a good time to take meetings and see what it's all about. Plus, there were enough interested people to give me a boost. It wasn't really a memoir and obviously not everything that happened in my life, but funny stories that happened.

The title is very humble, no?

Yeah, we went through 10-15 titles until we wound up with one everyone agreed with. They were all dumb titles, titles like Rags to Bitches, so they were happy with this one.

What are some of the juiciest tidbits in the book?

I have Chris Farley in there, but don't have a ton. I don't want to be Kate Winslet talking about Titanic 20 years later. But when you're close to someone like that, it's a big part of your life. I'm sure Dave Grohl gets asked about Kurt Cobain a lot. So I put in stories no one's ever heard —  how Chris Farley was with Lorne Michaels in our secret Monday evening meetings. I walk everyone through my time on Saturday Night Live, not getting on and being jealous of all the other guys. I talk about the guy that attacked me, how my maid was stealing from me, so I had to set up a sting operation. I talk about being hazed in a fraternity at Arizona State, when they covered me in olive oil and paprika, and the time they forced me to move rocks out of the river.

You also talk about Eddie Murphy hating you after you made your now infamous “Look, kids, a falling star! Quick, make a wish . . .” joke at his expense.

Eddie Murphy was not a big deal. But he was smart at the way he saw a wisp of tide changing. When you're on a supposedly cool show and you say someone's not, that can catch on quickly. He was smart to see that this shit has to stop here. That got blown out of proportion because of the possible eventual severity. So he called and straightened me out. That won the awkward call award.  But we saw each other at SNL 40 and everything's fine. He'll probably host SNL again.

Wasn't he being a bit too sensitive? Don't comedians have special permission to mock other comedians?

Well, I hate it when people make fun of me for not being good looking or short or for who I'm dating. Or when they do impressions that are not flattering. 

Speaking of dating, are relationships with beautiful women one of the best perks of fame?

We all know they're not dating me without it. The list that hooked up with me in high school is not like the list after Just Shoot Me. It's definitely a foot in the door. I'm not a great looking guy, but I try to be a nice and fun person. But women don't see that across the floor in a club. But if they see you on Letterman, that's introductory to a girl who'd never look me up. They might think, 'He cracks me up or we think along the same lines,' and that helps me, because a woman has never looked across the bar and said, 'I need to fuck him.'

Is beauty everything in a romantic partner?

No, I also want them to be interesting. I don't date as much as people think, but when I do, I want a girl who's funny — charming funny, not Don Rickles.

Are you dating anyone seriously now?

Wow, you're getting deep. Now you sound like her. Yes, I've dated a great girl off and on, and I don't know what I'm doing.

As the former Hollywood Minute commentator on SNL where you mocked celebrities such as Eddie Murphy, if the segment were still around, who today would you mock first?

The Kardashians are so ripe for the picking. They're a little beat up. I just heard them say that because Lamar Odom was in a coma, they had a family meeting and decided not to put anything on their apps that day. It's like, 'Woah, you think you're having a difficult time?' But I can't watch you make omelettes on Snapchat. They take themselves so seriously. Kim Kardashian was at the SNL reunion, and I thought, 'What the fuck? I thought I could get away from them for three hours, but now she's sitting in front of me. 

It was once a big deal to make fun of celebrities. But then Chelsea Handler and Daniel Tosh started doing it, and now everyone does it. Every entertainment reporter used to be so upbeat and had to love the stars. But now they can shit on them, too.

David Spade, Nov. 3, at Cobb's Comedy Club, ($40), 915 Columbus Ave, 928-4320 or

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Joshua Rotter


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