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Friday, June 20, 2014

Hell's Kitchen, Season 12: Seven Idiots Compete

Posted By on Fri, Jun 20, 2014 at 2:00 PM

While other higher-quality shows parse out their episodes like Turkish Delight by creating only ten (Game Of Thrones, por ejemplo), Hell's Kitchen draws out a season and milks the footage for all it's worth. So much so that Fox hasn't even released an end date for this season. All it says is, "To be determined."

Bloody Americans are so gullible - WIKIPEDIA
  • Wikipedia
  • Bloody Americans are so gullible

Perhaps they are taking their cues from Dante, and taking viewers through the many levels of Hell, or maybe the whole thing is one big metaphor for how long it takes the diners to actually get served dinner each night.

The silliest thing this show does is pretend that anyone gives a shit about the contestants. This week the remaining seven came into the dining room and were met with "screaming fans" and "paparazzi," in a red carpet event to launch what has to be the stupidest idea of all time: The Hell's Kitchen wall calendar.

That's right, each month features a past winner or runner-up. But here's the exciting part! December has yet to be determined! Any of the contestants could be chosen. All they had to do was cook something tasty, and then the judges would determine who among them would be in the very last month in the very last year of whatever pathetic wretch decides he needs to purchase such a thing. Everyone cooked their little hearts and out and everyone of course screwed up, but we won't know who won the coveted slot until next week. That's right, they left us with this cliffhanger. Cruel. But definitely a Divine Comedy.

Sixty minutes and still no scallops - WIKIPEDIA
  • Wikipedia
  • Sixty minutes and still no scallops

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About The Author

Katy St. Clair

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