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Wednesday, August 24, 2011

The Five Worst Movies Starring Saturday Night Live Alumni

Posted By on Wed, Aug 24, 2011 at 12:18 PM

deuce.jpg

There's nothing wrong with zoning out to a little mindless humor, and we'll be the first to admit that many evenings we still like to sit and giggle at one of these five silly but great comedies by Saturday Night Live alumni.

But the trick with mindless humor -- though it seems counterintuitive -- is that for it to work, it requires a good deal of wit and comedic timing. That's why some comedies go down well time and again, while others that conceptually should be funny are actually about as amusing as rubbing a cactus on your face for 90 minutes. Here are the five most epic failures from former SNL stars that might remind you of a funny idea you had last time you got stoned, except instead of staying in the basement these ideas became movies.

5. Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo starring Rob Schneider

Rob Schneider is Deuce Bigalow, a perpetually down-on-his-luck professional pool and fish tank cleaner who unwittingly ends up house-sitting for a gigolo with an exotic fish fetish. Of course he accidentally destroys one of the fish tanks and ends up whoring himself out to the gigolo's clients to raise the funds to replace it (because these kinds of things happen all the time).

Maybe if you don't know anything about prostitutes, or pimps, or sex or humor in general, you will giggle a bit when Deuce starts selling his own beer-and-weed-chiseled body to women who apparently can't get laid because they all oh-so-humorously deviate from the Hollywood standard of "hungry-looking, 90-pound blonde chick." At this point you can almost hear the producers deciding to order one more round before having some variation of the following conversation:

"And what if one of the chicks has Tourette's, and she's all like WHORE-TITS and SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS all the time?"

"Hur-hur, yeah, or what about gigantism? I wouldn't bone a chick who was way taller than me."

"More like she wouldn't bone you."

"Hey, fuck you."

"Wait, you guys, I've got it -- narcolepsy. And she faceplants into her soup!"

Don't get us wrong -- we're all for the occasional mindless comedy, but not when the majority of the movie's gags come from tired and obvious physical humor that is too boring to even be offensive.

Rotten Tomatoes score: 23 percent

What we'd rather be doing: Cleaning the cat box. With our bare hands.

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Angela Lutz

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