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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

The Sweet Spot: Why Women Love Watching Gay Male Porn

Posted By on Tue, Jul 12, 2011 at 10:30 AM

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In the film The Kids Are All Right, in one scene the main characters, a lesbian couple, break out their queer porn stash to get themselves in the mood to get down. Lesbians watching porn might not seem unusual -- until it is revealed that it is man-on-man gay porn.

What? Oh yes. A little-known fact is that quite a few gay, bi, and straight women are turning to the excitement of hot man sex for their viewing pleasure.

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Cornelius Conboy, formerly with Falcon Studios, one of the leading production companies of male-on-male porn, says, "It's always been an open secret that a lot of regular consumers of gay porn are women. Dykes particularly."

So what is this all about?

The simplest reason is that many women are turned off by how fake a lot of straight porn is.

"With gay male porn, the actors look like they're having fun and enjoying sex," one commenter wrote on Grace the Spot, a site that deals in lesbian entertainment, culture, and humor. "With all other types of porn, more often than not, it looks contrived, overacted, unbelievable, ridiculous, or just plain unfun."

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Frank, direct, good fucking is a large part of the appeal. But a lot of women also like gay male porn purely because we are turned on by hot men. In gay porn, there are all sorts of types to satisfy any taste. Pretty boys, buff boys, leather daddies, and all kinds of other man flavors are boldly laid out for us to enjoy.

I will totally admit to having a thing for gay men. I love them. However, I am not their type. This attraction of mine could be a manifestation of my attraction to men who are not interested in me. But isn't it true that often our sexual proclivities are directly inspired by our issues? Watching men enjoy each other allows me to enjoy the fantasy of being part of the play and simultaneously allows me to delight in not being involved at all.

Voyeurism, neurotic fulfillment, and hotness all at once. Who could ask for more?

Michele Rider, a local photographer and lesbian, also likes the possibility of fantasy.

"I like watching gay porn because there is an element of gender exploration and fun fantasy," she says. "I get to imagine how the other half lives."

Michele Rider
  • Michele Rider

These are all fun reasons to watch boys play, but Rose Anderson, a fashion designer and mother, likes gay porn because it is hard for her to dismiss ideas of exploitation while watching straight porn. By watching gay action, she feels like she can be socially conscious and lustful at the same time.

"I don't get the sense that the actors in gay porn would rather be doing something else," she says. "I can't help but worry about why those women have turned to porn to make money. Were they abused? Are they poverty stricken? Are they on drugs? Were they just young and naive and pushed into it?"

Obviously, all forms of pornography have the potential to be exploitative, and these questions could equally apply to male actors in the business. But for Anderson and many other women, the still too-rampant sexual abuse of women inhibits their enjoyment of straight porn.

Sadie Smythe
  • Sadie Smythe

In the end, we don't really need to explain why something turns us on. Sadie Smythe, author of Open All the Way, says as much when talking about why she loves guy-on-guy porn.

"It's not something I can explain; it just is what it is," she says. "I liken it to the reason that hetero men like girl-on-girl porn so much, because chicks get their dicks hard. Men are my weakness, they are the erotic rousers, the lowdown teasers, the totally torrid trippers of my brain's pleasure centers."

What arouses us defies all gender roles, political alliances, and moral codes. What we do in our physical life may be tame or consciously aligned with these concerns. But our erotic imaginations are free to explore all manner of titillations, be they queer, straight, violent, silly, or genuinely strange.

The beauty of erotic imagery is that it's transcendent -- a medium through which we taste what freedom feels like.

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The Sweet Spot is a weekly blog column about alternative sexuality by Ginger Murray. Check back next week for more.

Follow us on Twitter at @ExhibitionistSF and like us on Facebook.

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Ginger Murray

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