Maybe you've watched all the other games at home, and you want company for the big one. Maybe you can't figure out where else to find men. Whatever your reason to watch the NCAA Men's Basketball Championship game in a bar in the Marina, consider this incantation: "$3 22 oz. Gigantic Glass Coors Light." It's only one of the drink specials at Jake's Steaks, and it has so much magic in its every word, and in its philosophical entirety:
It isn't meant to be taken singly ("$3"), yet it is "Gigantic." And 22 ounces of light beer -- this is some kind of mage's riddle. Why does it even exist? Have another one. It's in glass, after all. Everyone knows basketball bracket-play is mystical, anyway. You make plans, you pony dollars, but only the seers and time will tell what is truly fated. Tonight's championship game is a literal dogfight: the UConn Huskies against the Butler Bulldogs; you don't want to be alone for the big one.
Jake's Steaks will have the championship game at 6:21 p.m. Admission is free.
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