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Category: Feature4 News2 The Snitch1

Year: 20125 20112

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News, The Snitch Fellow Republicans: A Five-Point to Stop Our Asses From Getting Kicked

Fellow Republicans: A Five-Point to Stop Our Asses From Getting Kicked

To: Lovers of America From: The Republican National Committee RE: Emergency platform changes Dear Patriots: It seems that 47 percent was somewhat larger than we anticipated in last week's election. Henceforth, we urge all Republicans to adopt these immediate policy…
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News, Feature How to Speak Republican: Decoding the GOP

How to Speak Republican: Decoding the GOP

Next week, the Republican Party will convene in Tampa to plot world domination. And you're feeling left out. Yes, you badly want in on the ground floor of the next culture war or invasion of a small, preferably Muslim country.…
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News, Feature America's Petro-Terrorists: How Speculators Drove Up Oil Prices

America's Petro-Terrorists: How Speculators Drove Up Oil Prices

Illustration by Pete Ryan. On July 11, 2008, the price of oil rose to $147 per barrel, a record high. Gas stations engaged in hot pursuit as the price of a gallon rocketed past $4. All hell was about…
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News, Feature American Parasite: Romney's Bain Represents Capitalism's Worst

American Parasite: Romney's Bain Represents Capitalism's Worst

Illustration by Dan Andreasen. James Sanderson had encountered a rare moment of industrial harmony. It was the early 1990s, and the 750 men and women at Georgetown Steel were pumping out wire rods at peak performance. They had an…
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News, The Super Bowl Prostitution Hoax

The Super Bowl Prostitution Hoax

Indianapolis is bracing for war. It's Super Bowl week, after all. Time for the Annual Invasion of the Hookers, which promises to be as harrowing as the Ottoman Empire's advance on Crete in 1647, though with considerably more nudity. Yes,…
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News, Feature Bowling For Chumps: How the Bowl System Robs U.S. Schools

Bowling For Chumps: How the Bowl System Robs U.S. Schools

Photo by Jennifer Silverberg. The summer sun glints off the Caribbean as the Majesty of the Seas, a luxurious 12-deck ship with nine bars and a topside pool, docks at a private island called CocoCay in the Bahamas. Guests…
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News, Mormons: A Shallow Yet Helpful Guide to See If You Should Hate Them or Not

Mormons: A Shallow Yet Helpful Guide to See If You Should Hate Them or Not

Last month, evangelical leaders gathered in D.C. for the Values Voter Summit, where disciples of the Pissed-Off Jesus harrumphed and yammered about how much America sucked. That's when the bomb ignited. Dallas megachurch preacher Robert Jeffress was on hand to…
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  • clipping at Brava Theater Sept. 11
    Sub Pop recording artists 'clipping.' brought their brand of noise-driven experimental hip hop to the closing night of 2016's San Francisco Electronic Music Fest this past Sunday. The packed Brava Theater hosted an initially seated crowd that ended the night jumping and dancing against the front of the stage. The trio performed a set focused on their recently released Sci-Fi Horror concept album, 'Splendor & Misery', then delved into their dancier and more aggressive back catalogue, and recent single 'Wriggle'. Opening performances included local experimental electronic duo 'Tujurikkuja' and computer music artist 'Madalyn Merkey.'"

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