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Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Forget Healthcare, Hostess Lovers Ask Obama to Nationalize Twinkie Industry

Posted By on Tue, Nov 20, 2012 at 1:37 PM

click to enlarge Will Obama socialize these?
  • Will Obama socialize these?

Only in America would people petition the President of the United States to nationalize the Twinkie industry, to ensure they can continue devouring those creme-filled cakes as they please.

As of 1:15 p.m., more than 3,600 people had signed onto the We the People petition, demanding the commander in chief set everything else aside and make the spongy cakes a domestic priority.

Per the petition:

We the undersigned, hereby request Barack Obama to immediately Nationalize the Twinkie industry and prevent our nation from losing her sweet creamy center.

Just yesterday, a federal judge ordered Hostess and its union into mediation to see if there's still a chance Americans can continue feeding off of Ho Ho's, Ding Dongs, and Twinkies. Both sides agreed to begin talks today.



On Nov. 12, Hostess Brands permanently closed three plants after workers went on strike, claiming that they've faced pay cuts, no overtime or holiday pay, a stop in the pension, and diminishing contributions to medical benefits. Hostess was ready to liquidate its assets when the judge yesterday halted the process, claiming that the bakery union never actually filed an official objection to the company's latest offer before going on strike.

The petition needs 21,330 signatures by Dec. 16 before policymakers (read: some intern) would even look at it. So if you really want to know that your great, great grandkids will have the same opportunity you did to enjoy those Twinkies, then sign the petition here.

Or, you could just buy a Twinkie now and bequeath it to future generations -- it'll still be edible in 60 years.


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About The Author

Erin Sherbert

Erin Sherbert

Bio:
Erin Sherbert was the Online News Editor for SF Weekly from 2010 to 2015. She's a Texas native and has a closet full of cowboy boots to prove it.

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