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Thursday, September 6, 2012

Endorse the Federal Narcotics Price Support Program and Other Drug War Euphemisms

Posted By on Thu, Sep 6, 2012 at 2:30 PM

click to enlarge Standing up for his rights - HTTP://BREAKINGBADAMC.TUMBLR.COM/
  • Standing up for his rights

To win a war, one must win the minds of the people (unless one chooses to vaporize said minds with a superweapon instead).

So the next time you step over a crack-addled soul sprawled out on a Tenderloin sidewalk, or dodge a gang of teenagers trying to sell you weed at the Stanyan Street entrance to Golden Gate Park, tell them this:

"It's not my fault -- it's the 'Federal Narcotics Price Support Program!'"

Opponents of the Drug War have long maintained that, just like with alcohol during Prohibition, making drugs illegal makes being a drug lord profitable. Who here would support the "Federal Mexican Drug Cartel Subsidy Program?" 

Brush up on these and other euphemisms for the 40-year government struggle against getting high before your next family holiday. A few more, after the jump.

Via The Advocates (who love themselves some small government, which apparently does not include a federally funded fighting force):

  • Federal Drug Lord Subsidy Program
  • Federal Drug Gang Subsidy Program
  • Mexican Drug Cartel Subsidy Program

  • Prison-Industrial Complex Subsidy
  • Border War Welfare Program
  • Reason Why We Can't Visit Juarez, Brought To You By Taxpayers
As usual, this is nothing new. But recasting the debate may be one way to win hearts and minds.

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About The Author

Chris Roberts

Chris Roberts has spent most of his adult life working in San Francisco news media, which is to say he's still a teenager in Middle American years. He has covered marijuana, drug policy, and politics for SF Weekly since 2009.


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