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Friday, January 28, 2011

Week in Gay: Ted Haggard is Bisexual and Anderson Cooper has a 'Companion'

Posted By on Fri, Jan 28, 2011 at 12:12 PM

click to enlarge Coming after cousin Geri
  • Coming after cousin Geri

This edition of The Week in Gay is a potpourri (either a miscellaneous collection of stories or a mixture of dried flowers and spices) of four categories - plus an extra special bonus!

Included are updates on the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell, the latest stories from San Francisco, salacious celebrity scandals, and more same-sex marriage news than any reasonable person could keep up with (except for the superhuman Matt Baume. How do you do it?

Fasten your seat belts and put your tray tables in their upright positions please, as we prepare to jump....

The lingering fumes of DADT
Today, the Pentagon is expected to reveal its plan for the implementation of the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell, the military's ban on open service by LGBT personnel. A schedule for training higher-ups to love homosexuality will be established first, followed by hilarious ass-taping rituals over the summer, and then when everyone has a pillow to bite, DADT will be repealed.

The Thomas Moore Law Center, a nonprofit public interest law firm dedicated to the defense and promotion of the religious freedom of Christians, is pushing Congress (as shown in this video) to amend the DADT repeal, making it that much more difficult to implement.

The Defense Department sent former Lt. Dan Choi a bill for $2,500 to reimburse the government for his discharge under DADT. Choi disputes the claim.

Spotlight on: San Francisco
Lyon-Martin Health Services, a medical clinic that provides services for low-income and uninsured clients, is closing its doors for good this week due to serious financial problems. Michael Petrelis reports on an emergency community meeting held this week that addressed the closure.

Roberta Achtenberg, former member of the Board of Supervisors and one time candidate for mayor of San Francisco, has been appointed by President Obama to serve on the U.S. Commission for Civil Rights. Achtenberg is known (by dead southern supremacist Senator Jesse Helms) as a militant activist, mean lesbian which, hopefully, is true because that classification is sorely lacking on the civil rights commission.

The LGBT Community Center would really like YOU to open a restaurant on the top floor of their building because they need cash!

Former member of the Board of Supervisors and current candidate for mayor, Bevan Dufty, shared his story of being bullied as a teenager living in New York City. He's practically the reincarnation of Harvey Milk (or that's what he'd like you think).

Celebrities are people too!
CNN anchor Anderson Cooper is almost officially gay. Cooper has a pal that is now being referred to as his "companion" instead of his "friend." Let's hope they make the leap to butt-buddies by Valentine's Day.

I only have vague recollections of the 1980s television show The Facts of Life, but this week one of the actors from the show has confessed (via a new book!) to being a militant activist, mean lesbian (or something like that).

In an interview with GQ magazine, disgraced minister Ted Haggard admits that he is bisexual and announces: "Hey, I'm a masturbation guy!"

Elton John (never one to turn down a paycheck) appeared on the cover of US Magazine with his partner and their new child in a photograph that was deemed too evil for hell itself by a supermarket in Arkansas.

New York: poll results show 56 percent support recognition of same-sex marriage.
Hawaii: once again will consider passing civil union legislation for the second-class gays.
Iowa: threatens to ban ALL gay relationship recognition; public hearings are next week.
California: contributes to the demise of DOMA via a lawsuit now headed for federal court.
Maryland: on the verge of passing legislation that would make same-sex marriage legal.
DC: the House of Representatives will push to repeal same-sex marriage laws in the nation's capital.

Extra credit: James Franco
There is nothing remotely gay about James Franco appearing on The Daily Show, but when I see Franco and Stewart together, my heart melts into a puddle of liberal, gay filth.

Patrick Connors is an uppity fag who aspires to be a militant activist mean lesbian.

Follow him on Twitter at @UppityFag and @TheSnitchSF   

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