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Friday, April 23, 2010

It's Your Friday Morning News Quiz!

Posted By on Fri, Apr 23, 2010 at 7:30 AM

click to enlarge Another week in the books in San Francisco - JOE ESKENAZI
  • Joe Eskenazi
  • Another week in the books in San Francisco
Does every week feel like two weeks for everyone? Or just us? In any event, here's a roundup of news events from just this one week. Per usual, send your answers to me, here. First person to e-mail a perfect score wins a prize. Let the games begin.

1. Who are Steven Apilado, LaRon Charles, and Jon Russ?

A. The three bisexual softball players told they weren't gay enough to play in the Gay World Series
B. The three undercover cops who shot at each other in Bayview because none of them knew the others were cops
C. The three lawyers representing a man suing Froot Loops because he thought it contained fruit
D. The three police commissioners whose terms expire on April 30 -- and the city hasn't bothered to appoint anyone to succeed them

2. What excuse did a controversial witness for the prosecution use to skip out of his testimony at a recent San Francisco DUI trial?

A. He was going to miss his favorite TV show
B. He was too drunk to make it to court
C. He shit in his pants
D. He claimed two separate men on the jury were his cousins; neither were

click to enlarge But who was Joe Nedney kicking against? - JOE ESKENAZI
  • Joe Eskenazi
  • But who was Joe Nedney kicking against?
3. What feat of historic ineptitude did the San Francisco Giants manage this week for the first time in the team's 52-year West Coast history?

A. They showed up at the wrong stadium for a game
B. They allowed one hit, total, and lost
C. They had two players cross each other on the basepaths, erasing home runs
D. They committed six errors in a game

4. What did a writer for Maxim magazine see fit to compare San Francisco's Dynamo Dounts to?

A. Female genitalia
B. His own genitalia
C. Animal genitalia
D. Sarah Palin

5. Who did 49er Joe Nedney outperform in a Monday field goal-kicking competition?

A. Gavin Newsom 
B. Robin Williams
C. Ziggy the killer robot
D. Brad Pitt

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.


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