Without a doubt, the San Francisco Giants' top sartorial story of the young season has been utilityman Eugenio Velez taking the field last week outfitted in a jersey reading "San Francicso."
More than any bullshit orbiting around Janet Jackson's ta-tas, this truly was
a wardrobe malfunction (SF Weekly
's query to the team about its plans for the jersey -- charity auction, Hall of Fame, incinerator -- have not yet been answered).
It's unfortunate that L'Affaire San Francicso
has highlighted the annals of the Giants' fashion sense thus far. Because, if possible, they've looked even better on the field than they've played. Your humble narrator was wary of the team's notion of altering their uniforms to denote Sunday games. The last time 'round, in 2002, this entailed wearing black tops with cream or gray bottoms, and a black-on-black hat
. When stretched onto Barry Bonds' oversize head or laid across Andres Galarraga's size-54 back -- it was less than impressive.
But the current Sunday alteration is actually a welcome addition to the team's uniform canon: An orange-billed cap
of the sort the team wore between 1977 and 1982. This era spawned some of the worst uniforms any team has ever worn on a baseball field
-- sorry, garish pullovers may look great as ironic style or on an attractive fan, but they looked bad on Johnnie Lemaster
. Via this guilt by association, the orange-billed cap has been blacklisted. If you were going to rescue one element of 1970s baseball fashion -- this is it.
By the way, if the team is, as we've heard, contemplating wearing orange jerseys -- forget everything we just wrote.
Continuing the great nostalgic duds, Barry Zito's socks almost outshone his stellar performance vs. Houston last week. Get a load of them: Black, knee-high, with three orange horizontal stripes.
The team really ought to instruct people where they can buy those. Because people will.