Get SF Weekly Newsletters

Monday, January 19, 2009

Clap On! See Where San Francisco Stands in National STD Survey

Posted By on Mon, Jan 19, 2009 at 7:59 AM

click to enlarge peter_lorre_m_thumb_400x300.jpg
When in a city beginning with the letter "M," pack your own condoms -- or else

The results of the Centers for Disease Control's annual survey on whether we've been naughty or nice are in again -- and there's a whole lotta shaking (and itching, burning, and blistering) going on.

Educated folks can argue about whether healthy -- or, rather, unhealthy -- surges in chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis are due to increased risky behavior or increased vigilance in testing (Lou Dobbs, we're sure, will blame immigrants). But for San Francisco partisans, the real question is: How'd we do? Well, to quote Bill Clinton -- no joke about STDs intended -- "We can do better."

Chlamydia:

Between 2006 and 2007, the number of San Francisco-area residents infected with the disease rose from 372.4

to 399.8 per 100,000.To put this in perspective, the national average is 394 -- and the worst  spots, Memphis and Milwaukee, tallied 890 and 672, respectively. Apparently, living in a city that begins with the letter "M" increases one's chances for contracting chlamydia.

Gonorrhea:

From '06 to '07, our rate-per-100,000 for this disease actually dropped from 144.2

to 136.2. Hey, let's put that on our tourism literature -- but don't mention that the national average is only 129.4. The most gonorrhea-friendly locales in the nation: Memphis and Milwaukee -- again! (373 and 328.5 -- do they sell perforated condoms in cities that begin with "M"?).

Syphilis:

Once again, we've got a good-news, bad-news thing going here: Our rates have dropped (8.7

to 7.4) but still top the national average (5.7). Memphis and Milwaukee lose their bid for the Triple Crown -- the most syphilis-happy locale in the U.S. is Birmingham, Al. (17.2). Competing strongly were New Orleans (16.4), Memphis (Damn! 16.3), and Atlanta and San Diego (11.8). 

The lesson -- as always -- involves condoms and whatnot. And if ever in a city starting with an "M," bring your own. Theirs are no good, apparently.


  • Pin It

Tags: , ,

About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Bio:
Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Popular Stories

  1. Most Popular Stories
  2. Stories You Missed

Like us on Facebook

Slideshows

  • clipping at Brava Theater Sept. 11
    Sub Pop recording artists 'clipping.' brought their brand of noise-driven experimental hip hop to the closing night of 2016's San Francisco Electronic Music Fest this past Sunday. The packed Brava Theater hosted an initially seated crowd that ended the night jumping and dancing against the front of the stage. The trio performed a set focused on their recently released Sci-Fi Horror concept album, 'Splendor & Misery', then delved into their dancier and more aggressive back catalogue, and recent single 'Wriggle'. Opening performances included local experimental electronic duo 'Tujurikkuja' and computer music artist 'Madalyn Merkey.'"