There are a few things the world of popular culture doesn't need more of. The first is contrived and soulless reality show television. The second is a continuing limited idea of "proper" female sexuality. And the third is lousy fucking pop music. Prepare to be dazzled, then, by one single that covers all of those hideous bases. Welcome to "Gentleman" by British pop starlets/American E! reality TV stars, The Saturdays.
Which takes us to the chorus. Can somebody please make some sense of this for us?
Before we even get to any of the aforementioned faults, there are a few other things to talk about. The first and most glaring problem with "Gentleman" is the ladies' godawful attempt at American accents. Sure, it's not unusual for British singers to adopt a U.S. twang while singing -- frankly, it just sounds sleeker than the Billy Bragg approach, so we understand completely why it's sometimes necessary.
The Saturdays here, though, are out of the realms of emphasizing their 'R's unnaturally for the sake of clarity and straight slap-bang in the middle of cringe-worthy, inaccurate ghetto impersonations. People in the British Isles, for the record, do not say "hit it and quit it" with a great deal of regularity.
Then there's all of the weird slut-shaming lyrics here. "You're not a lady if you're always on your knees," they sing; "He's already had the milk, so why would he go buy the cow?" they also sing. Oh, right ladies. Okay. Us women should just keep our vaginas off limits until the wedding night then, yeah? Because real ladies don't have sexual urges. Yawn-fuckin'-yawn.