When the ancient Polynesians invented surfing, they often used a paddle to help them navigate. Fast-forward a few millennia, and Stand-Up Paddleboarding, or SUP, finds itself trendy again. Part of its increasing popularity is that standing upright allows surfers to spot waves more easily and thus catch more of them, multiplying the fun factor. Paddling back to the wave becomes less of a strain as well. The ability to cruise along on flat inland water, surveying the sights, is another advantage. Finally, its a good core workout. If youre sold on the idea, schedule an intro SUP lesson, free with board and paddle rental, and you may find yourself riding the waves like a Polynesian king.More
In the past 30 years, light artists have reimagined an art form that has always had the ability to turn the night sky, or a simple window, into luminescence. Last fall, the Yerba Buena Center for the Arts turned its southern glass wall into a parade of sound-sensing lights, Lightswarm, that changes with the movements of nearby people and things. Future Cities Lab, the San Francisco design company behind Lightswarm, has originated another notable light sculpture. Located by the YBCA's steps at 701 Mission, Murmur Wall will light up in arresting ways as it incorporates local trending search engine results and social media postings. Onlookers can offer their own contributions, which will feed into the Murmur Wall's data stream and light up the sculpture. What's trending in San Francisco? If you're walking by the YBCA, you can see firsthand — at least through light patterns that reflect the city's volatile internet habits.
Murmur Wall debuts Thursday at 6 p.m. and continues through May 31, 2017, at Yerba Buena Center for the Arts, 701 Mission St., S.F. Free; 415-978-2700 or ybca.org. More
Nothing caps off a nice day at the beach like a mouthful of sand — especially if the grit in your teeth is the reward for the grit required to splay flat-out on your stomach, for the prize of a plastic disc in your hand, and all the glory that comes along with it.
Well, it's been a few months, so we shouldn't be all that surprised but Kanye West's ego has been running amok again. This time the behemoth emerged while West was onstage in Paris last Saturday, and said: "No matter how they try to control you, or the motherfucker next to you tries to peer pressure you, you can do what you motherfucking want. I am Picasso. I'm Walt Disney, I'm Steve Jobs."
Hearing Kanye compare himself to one of the greatest artists of all time, the man who changed children's entertainment forever, and the guy who turned our world into real-life sci-fi -- all at the same time -- made us think of other crazy musicians who've had similar outbursts in which they compare themselves to totally inappropriate figures. Here are five of our favorites.
Nicki Minaj tells us she's like Marilyn Monroe, in song form
Marilyn Monroe was one of the most enigmatic movie stars in history. Enchantingly beautiful and undoubtedly talented, she was a fascinating mix of frightening vulnerability and extraordinary sex appeal. She played the dumb blonde, but, on her own time, successfully engaged with some of the smartest men of her era. Then there's Nicki Minaj, who, if this song is anything to go on, thinks that being simultaneously insecure and bratty while wearing a blonde wig means that she totally understands everything Monroe must have struggled with and gone through. Idiot.
Madonna thinks she's French, like Napoleon. Or something.
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One time, Madonna said: "I have a special affinity with France, and I have for many years. It could go all the way to Napoleon because I think of myself as a revolutionary." Revolutionary, like little dudes who start wars all over Europe and then pick an ill-advised fight with Russia? C'mon, Madge. That makes little sense, even for you. Also, Napoleon didn't try and make all of his relevant points by flashing naked body parts to unsuspecting members of the public. Better analogy needed at once.
Justin Bieber compares himself to Kurt Cobain... or does he?
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"I feel like the Kurt Cobain of my generation, but people just don't understand me." When this quote was attributed to Justin Bieber and unleashed online, the internet almost imploded, such was the rage unfurled in the Biebs' direction from horrified Nirvana fans. Rumors persisted that the whole thing was a hoax, but we've actually never heard li'l Justin deny saying it. So we'll leave it up to you to decide. If he did say it, it is literally one of the dumbest things we've ever heard... which means we kind of hope he said it. John Lennon and that whole Jesus thing
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If there's a lesson to be learned from ol' Commie pants John Lennon saying that the Beatles were "more popular than Jesus," it's that you can use a hyperbolic statement in interviews for dramatic emphasis, just as long as Southern states don't hear you doing it. While it was a foolish thing to say (asking for trouble much, John?), Lennon's quote during a British interview went entirely unnoticed until the religious right in this fair country of ours got a hold of it and lost their freakin' minds. It's best to just leave Jesus out of things, in our experience.
Chris Brown is being crucified like Jesus, y'all.
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Someone should've told Chris Brown what happened to John Lennon after he said something about Jesus. The above picture was not, in fact, put together by a 12-year-old in math class, it was actually thrown up on Instagram by Chris Brown one time, accompanied by the words: "Painting the way I feel today." Don't you get it, guys? When you tell Chris Brown he's a bad person for beating the crap out of a woman, it's just like when Jesus Christ was murdered for trying to bring the world together and shit. Obvs. (Clearly Chris Brown doesn't know that Chris Brown is the worst human being on earth.)
the way I feel today. Focus on what matters!" - See more at: