We'd like to congratulate you on being in the Top 3 of the Billboard chart, with your incredible 21 album, for 22 weeks straight now. For 12 of those, you've been at No. 1, and we couldn't be happier for you. It's an amazing feat.
We think this achievement is incredible for a number of reasons, but let's start by saying that you're the only 23-year-old woman we can think of who's achieving this level of success in the charts right now while in a fully clothed state. We'd started to think that unless young ladies ran around in their underwear, wearing ridiculous bras and cliched corsets and all manner of ass-baring panties, no one would even give them a record deal. But you've gone and proved us wrong, and shown us that yes, sometimes, sheer, unabashed talent will prevail over all else. Phew, Adele. Phew.
We also love that you've achieved this level of success while maintaining
a mostly stony face and an interview manner which your fellow Brits
would probably best describe as "arsey". We love that, along with all that talent, you carry with you an attitude that suggests you don't want to play the game, as well as an unerring sense of dignity and grace, in the face of people who can't stop talking about your dress size (god forbid a normal-sized woman get anywhere in the pop charts, eh?)
We love the fact that you let the music speak for itself -- and oh, what volumes it speaks. You sure are honest, Adele -- so honest, it's painful sometimes. But we love that too.
We get the feeling that you're not bothered about all this publicity nonsense -- that you just want to live your life and make your albums and play your shows. We love that you've reminded us that being this phenomenally successful in the music business doesn't always mean dumbing down or selling your soul or, heck, even bothering to crack a smile when you don't bloody feel like it.
We love that you're foreign too. Not sure if you've noticed, but this fine country of ours tends to not buy British music unless it's made by men with guitars. Yet you snuck in under the radar successfully and we have to applaud that. Last week, you said you were able to do it because Amy Winehouse had already forged the path for you. We thought that was both very humble and an extremely lovely tribute to a vocalist we wish, wish, wish was still with us.
Did we mention that we think your voice is unbelievable, cathartic, and and so soul-shattering that our brains can't believe it came out of someone so young?
So thanks, Adele. Thanks for it all. But most of all, thanks for your two beautiful albums because even if you quit tomorrow (please don't), we'll have them forever. Industry folk say that music sales are recovering and it has a lot to do with you. So pat yourself on the back, lovely. And just keep doing what you're doing.