THE BABY IS GONE! An owl tears through the window and suddenly there is
a vision of pure glam: David Bowie. The Goblin King. He kindly reminds
Sarah that she hates her brother and that she asked to have the
sparkling androgynous superstar take the baby in the first place. Like
most whiny girls, Sarah's horrified that her petty teenage wishes would
manifest this way. How will she explain this to her parents? Will they
still pay for her liberal arts education after high school? With her
brother gone who will she have to resent? Then the King raises the
stakes -- if she can't get through the labyrinth to his castle fast
enough he's going to turn her brother into a goblin. Then Sarah lets
out her first chorus of "it's not fair." Her mantra of sorts.
Entering the Labyrinth, Sarah realizes it's harder than she anticipated
and Bowie's rules are far from fair. Monstrous muppets and untold
challenges wait around every corner. Fortunately, there is a lesson to
be learned from all of this. The power of friendship. Along the way
Sarah meets Hoggle, Ludo and Didymus. Hoggle works for the Goblin King
but after Sarah declares him as her friend he knows he must help her.
He has a very lumpy nose. Ludo, the lovable beast, can summon rocks
with his voice. Didymus has no fear and also no proper judgment. As
friends they can make it through the labyrinth (even the Bog of Eternal
Stench, which is very reminiscent of the Fire Swamp from the Princess
Bride) to rescue the baby.
The journey is spattered with wise men, fire-y head throwers, junk
ladies (think Fraggle Rock) and many ways to fail. Luckily, they don't.
And lucky for the audience, the film is filled with David Bowie songs
including "Magic Dance," easily one of his best works. Between the
glam, drama, muppets and babies I think it's fair to say Labyrinth is
not only a cult classic, but a cinematic masterpiece.
Personal Bias: Come on, it's BOWIE.
Random Detail: There was karaoke before the movie started.
By the Way: It's playing tonight as well. 21+ with a bar.