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Music, All Shook Down The 10 Best Things R. Kelly Said Friday Night at Oracle Arena

The 10 Best Things R. Kelly Said Friday Night at Oracle Arena

OK, I'll admit it: I'm not a raving R. Kelly fan. I don't know the name of every song in his expansive discography, except the obvious "I Believe I Can Fly," and "Ignition," but dammit if this guy didn't have…
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Music, Sizzle & Fizzle Sizzle and Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

Sizzle and Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

Sizzle Anyone looking to get an Outkast fix should look to Treasure Island Music Festival, where the Atlanta rap duo is headlining along with Brit beat-hounds Massive Attack. The rest of the lineup looks solid, too, with TV on the…
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Music, Sizzle & Fizzle Sizzle & Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

Sizzle & Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

sizzle Local rap godfather E-40 put out three albums just last week, bringing his total album count over the last three years to an astonishing 12, if you count the two he released last year with Too $hort. When this…
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Music, Hear This Trapped in the Closet: Sing-A-Long Preview

Trapped in the Closet: Sing-A-Long Preview

Among this early millennium's pop culture oddities, there is basically nothing as confounding, notorious, and weirdly delightful as the R. Kelly song cycle Trapped in the Closet. A now-33-chapter drama of cheating, counter-cheating, and counter-counter-cheating, with characters involved in something…
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Music, All Shook Down The-Dream's "Slow It Down" Feat. Fabolous: Let the Eye-Rolling Contest Begin

The-Dream's "Slow It Down" Feat. Fabolous: Let the Eye-Rolling Contest Begin

If ever a group of humans decided to get together and have a competition to see who could roll their eyes hardest, The Dream's "Slow It Down" (featuring Fabolous) would be an ideal song to get the ball rolling. There…
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Music, All Shook Down R. Kelly Previews New Music, Remains Completely Hilarious

R. Kelly Previews New Music, Remains Completely Hilarious

Remember when Dave Chappelle did his "(I Wanna) Pee On You" skit? The one that provided us all with huge laughs at the expense of R. Kelly, after the singer was accused of peeing on, and having sex with, an…
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Music, Hear This Van Hunt: Show Preview

Van Hunt: Show Preview

Two years ago, Maxwell drew widespread hysteria from R&B nerds when he released the sleekly sexy BLACKsummers'night. R. Kelly's back-to-basics Love Letter was greeted with critical raves last winter. Yet somehow the equally soulful Van Hunt remains overlooked. That wasn't…
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Music, All Shook Down Your Week in Parties: Sososoon, Teengirl Fantasy, DJ Sneak, and More

Your Week in Parties: Sososoon, Teengirl Fantasy, DJ Sneak, and More

The weekend before us is one of the craziest out of the year. It's a time when two of the Bay Area's most popular outdoor festivals collide: LovEvolution and the Folsom Street Fair. I've already written up a recommendation…
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Music, Sizzle & Fizzle Sizzle & Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

Sizzle & Fizzle: Highs and Lows from the Last Week in S.F. Music

Sizzle • R. Kelly kept things remarkably restrained at a Friday night show nearly three years to the day after he was acquitted of child pornography charges. But even without any Trapped in the Closet songs, superhero anthems like "The…
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Music, All Shook Down Friday Night: R. Kelly Keeps Waist in Check While Delivering Oakland's Love Letter

Friday Night: R. Kelly Keeps Waist in Check While Delivering Oakland's Love Letter

R. Kelly June 10, 2011 @ Oracle Arena Better than: Praying for a 23rd (or predicting the 73,000th) installment of "Trapped in the Closet" It's been three years to the day since R. Kelly was acquitted of 14 counts of soliciting, videotaping,…
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Dining, SFoodie

The Cheesiest Food Songs of 2010

These eight songs aspired to be hot enough to melt our popsicle, but all they did was make us taste cheddar. Behold, our countdown of the cheesiest food-themed songs of 2010: 8. "Ms. Chocolate" by Lil Jon featuring R. Kelly…
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Music, All Shook Down True Soccer Anthems are Catchy, Curse-Laden, and Mean-Spirited

True Soccer Anthems are Catchy, Curse-Laden, and Mean-Spirited

Don't be alarmed to turn on ESPN this month and hear some witty Englishman declare the arc of a round ball through space "inspired," "creative" or "clever." It's World Cup season -- the month-long Super Bowl-meets-Olympics-meets-Mardi Gras of that "beautiful…
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Calendar, Night&Day Late Night with Chelsea Lately

Late Night with Chelsea Lately

An attractive blond woman with cojones, comedian Chelsea Handler can be an acquired taste. As the host of Chelsea Lately over the past three or so years, she often comes off as insufferably annoying. But her undeniable wit, as she…
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Music, Al Green goes back to the basics

Al Green goes back to the basics

Today's multiplatinum pop artists too easily bend their signature sounds into formulaic molds. They all seem to carry some variation on the stuttery Timbaland beat or T-Pain's Auto-Tuned microphone; current conventions for chasing success have been taken to an absurdist…
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Music, All Shook Down Sing Along to R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet this Friday at Mezzanine

Sing Along to R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet this Friday at Mezzanine

Apparently a lot of people have never gotten over R. Kelly's musical...opera, spectacle, odyssey, epic...whatever you want to call it. I call "Trapped in the Closet" pretty prog rock, what with all the characters, themes, emotions and storyline involved.…
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Calendar, Night&Day

Come Out of the Closet!

Call us sick and twisted, but the Bay Area has an appreciation for the ridiculous musical humor of R. Kelly, the embattled R&B star who's expected to finally go to trial this year on child pornography charges dating to 2002.…
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Music, The infamy rollercoaster that is R. Kelly's life

The infamy rollercoaster that is R. Kelly's life

Six Flags execs should be envious of all the twists, turns, surges, and plunges that have taken place in the five years since R. Kelly caught multiple child pornography charges. They can't build as crazy a roller coaster as the…
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Music, All Shook Down R. Kelly to Share Closet Space with Ne-Yo in Oakland

R. Kelly to Share Closet Space with Ne-Yo in Oakland

This just in! R. Kelly just chose his new pisspal, er, I mean tour opener -- Ne-Yo! I just don't get it though. So you can pee in a toilet and it's okay, but if you pee on a…
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Music, Reviewed R. Kelly

R. Kelly

The most perverse moment on R. Kelly's new album is, surprisingly, neither "The Zoo" — a slow-jam full of animal noises that suggests he and his lady had some company in the sack — nor "Sex Planet," which offers a…
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Music, All Shook Down

Knockin' Boots with R. Kelly! On Uranus!

When the International Astronomical Union bounced Pluto out of the official list of planets in our solar system last year, many of us felt betrayed. We grew up believing in nine planets, nine apolitical Supreme Court justices, and nine Ring…
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