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Music, Hear This No Joy: Show Preview

No Joy: Show Preview

What do you picture when you think of a song called "Hawaii"? Is it piña coladas on the beach, the pleasant strums of a ukulele, or warm water and ample sunlight plucked from your chillest daydreams? Well, No Joy won't…
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News, The Snitch Larry Ellison's Plans to Buy Part of Hawaii Approved

Larry Ellison's Plans to Buy Part of Hawaii Approved

Last week we told you that Oracle CEO and obnoxious bajillionaire Larry Ellison had big plans to purchase part of Hawaii -- and we weren't kidding. According to press reports, the sale went through yesterday, and Ellison will officially own…
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News, The Snitch Larry Ellison to Buy Part of Hawaii

Larry Ellison to Buy Part of Hawaii

Because being an obnoxious bajillionaire wasn't satisfying enough, Oracle CEO Larry Ellison has decided to buy majority of the "Pineapple Island" in Hawaii.Hawaii Gov. Neil Abercrombie told the Associated Press that Ellison is in the process of purchasing 98 percent…
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News, Feature Soup to Nuts: Crazy Food Taxes Penalize the Poor, Benefit the Rich

Soup to Nuts: Crazy Food Taxes Penalize the Poor, Benefit the Rich

Illustration by Jesse Lefkowitz. Not so long ago, a San Francisco tax lawyer and habitual hot chocolate drinker named William Weissman was puzzled as to why he paid sales tax at some Starbucks, but not others. So, he did…
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News, The Snitch Joe Arpaio's 'Cold Case Posse' Concludes Obama's Birth Certificate is Fake

Joe Arpaio's 'Cold Case Posse' Concludes Obama's Birth Certificate is Fake

We last heard from Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio back in December, when a panel of judges from the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, based in San Francisco, grilled his lawyer on the sheriff's alleged violation of…
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News, The Snitch Hawaii Governor Refuses to Defend Gay Marriage Ban in Court

Hawaii Governor Refuses to Defend Gay Marriage Ban in Court

As the battle over the constitutionality of California's ban on gay marriage wends its way through the federal courts, the challenge to a similar law in Hawaii has taken a surprising turn.Neil Abercrombie, Hawaii's Democratic governor, said this week he…
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News, Sucka Free City

List: Why Burning Man Sold Out Early This Year

For the first time, Burning Man has sold out in advance. What's different about 2011? • This year it's being held in Hawaii • People finally heard about the naked chicks • Bobblehead promotion • Jennifer, the cute barista everyone…
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News, The Snitch Men Walking Across United States Pass Through San Francisco

Men Walking Across United States Pass Through San Francisco

Four magicians have set out to walk nearly 3,000 miles across the United States -- from San Francisco to New York City. And their reasoning is not much different from Forrest Gump's: Because they felt like it.SF Weekly spoke to…
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Music, All Shook Down Watch: Roach Gigz Made a Video for 'Syrup Thighs' on His Tropical Vacation

Watch: Roach Gigz Made a Video for 'Syrup Thighs' on His Tropical Vacation

Low-budget rap videos are a comedy genre all their own -- see this wacked-out clip for S.F. rhymer Roach Gigz's "Syrup Thighs" for proof. Having blown a wad of cash on a Hawaiian (?) vacation, Gigz apparently had little money/time/interest left…
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News, The Snitch The Week in Gay: Anti-Immigration Laws Bad, Anti-Gay Laws Good

The Week in Gay: Anti-Immigration Laws Bad, Anti-Gay Laws Good

I'm just going to say this once - up front - and then I'm going to move on: The furor raised over the Arizona illegal immigrant law is interesting to watch from my queer perch. I understand the outrage.…
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News, Sucka Free City List: Gavin Newsom's next steps

List: Gavin Newsom's next steps

Now that San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom has ended his campaign for governor, what are his top priorities for his last two years in office? • Go to Hawaii • Stop endorsing Clintons • Tell the homeless to go connect…
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News, The Snitch What Did Gavin Newsom Bring Everyone From Hawaii?

What Did Gavin Newsom Bring Everyone From Hawaii?

On the one hand, following Mayor Gavin Newsom's abrupt withdrawal from the governor's race, he spent quality time back in a beautiful city nestled in the bosom of the Pacific. On the other hand -- it was in Hilo, Hawaii.…
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News, The Snitch Police Chief Blames San Francisco Gang For Crime Wave -- In Hawaii

Police Chief Blames San Francisco Gang For Crime Wave -- In Hawaii

Honolulu police chief Boisse Correa -- who has probably endured his fill of "Book 'em Boisse" jokes -- would like to append the old ditty "I Left My Heart in San Francisco." He'd like visitors to his fair city to…
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Calendar, Night&Day Black Rock City

Black Rock City

The Black Choreographers Festival's innovative dance mentoring program must really be working out. This year, all but one of the presenting dancemakers are from the Bay Area — and the organizers have incredibly tough standards; we know they're not settling.…
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News, Clickable Clit I’m all black and blue. Thanks, internet!

I’m all black and blue. Thanks, internet!

The Clickable Clit continues this week with more online adventures from the personal life of an SF-based cybersex expert… Wednesday, July 30, 11:30 a.m. Oh no, it’s the return of the awkward “LOL.” A few years back, I wrote a…
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News, The Snitch Newsom, Siebel Totally Getting Hitched

Newsom, Siebel Totally Getting Hitched

It's official: Gavin Newsom and girlfriend Jennifer Siebel are engaged to be married. According to the Chronicle's "knowledgeable sources" the mayor popped the question in Hawaii over the weekend. Aww, how disgustingly sweet! But don't go looking for a…
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News, The Snitch Newsom's Cosco Busan Oil Spill 'Local Emergency' Declaration Misses Boat

Newsom's Cosco Busan Oil Spill 'Local Emergency' Declaration Misses Boat

It's good to know our newly-reelected mayor is on top of things. Yesterday, nearly a week after the 58,000-gallon Cosco Busan oil spill, Newsom got around to declaring a local emergency. So, what took so long? Was he busy…
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News, The Apologist

Split Decision

Buried in the complex House of Representatives budget bill, which is under consideration as the congressional session concludes its pre-holiday business, is a provision that would split the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 9th Circuit. It's a longtime dream…
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Dining, Eat Raw and Polished

Raw and Polished

"There's no accounting for taste" is a phrase that used to confuse me, a little. But taste is the only thing that counts, I'd think. It makes more sense to me in its Latin original, De gustibis non est disputandum,…
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Music, Revolutions

Revolutions

In the hyperkinetic world of hip hop, fortunes are won and lost, trends rise and fall, and careers wax and wane in what seems like the blink of an eye. Five years is a lifetime, and it's been nearly that…
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