2. It long ago jumped the shark, but if The Girl + The Fig revived a famous quote from New York chef David Chang on a T-shirt, it could be hot again: "Fuckin' every restaurant in San Francisco is just serving figs on a plate."
3. Apple wizard Steve Jobs couldn't get a table at Flour + Water recently; we'd like to see the restaurant make shirts emblazoned with "WWJD (What Would Jobs Do)?" on the front and "Make a reservation!" on the back.
5. It already exists in small button form, but baker Gobba Gobba Hey's slogan, "It's not a whoopie pie, motherfucker, it's a gob" deserves to be visible from at least 50 feet.