Don't let the picture above fool you. There's nothing spectacular about 19th place.
The folks at WalletHub.com broke more than a few hearts last week when they ranked San Francisco 19th best honeymoon destination in America. We're sandwiched right in between Detroit and Phoenix, while Chicago and Las Vegas take top honors, respectively.
Clearly our foggy weather shouldn't have factored toward our pitiful score because Chicago might as well be Antarctica as far as we're concerned -- yet they're number one. The real mystery though is how in the name of holy matrimony did Las Vegas manage to be runner-up. Isn't Sin City more suitable for bachelor/bachelorette parties than for honeymoons? Not to be a frigid pessimist, but after the vows are exchanged, whatever happens in Vegas ends up in divorce court. Think about it.
On second thought, think about San Francisco's honeymoon breakdown instead.
At least we're tied for second with Las Vegas for most attractions and activities! We hate to bring this up again, but how does Vegas continue to creep up so high? Not to be mean, but Vegas is more aesthetically tacky than the rest of us. There's nothing romantic about quarter slots and Margaritaville.
Don't get upset, Vegas. We didn't mean tacky. We meant vulgar. Baby come back.
Excuse our rude behavior it's just we're feeling left out in the cold in the Bay. Wait a minute. Shouldn't cold weather work in our favor? Cold weather equals romantic snuggling! No? Alright, we'll stick to 19th for now. Happy nuptials, everyone.